Army of Mom

So this is how liberty dies ... with thunderous applause.


Wins and losses

Soccer today was event-filled. Our team of 10-year-olds, which won the division last season, was playing the second place team. The fields were saturated and sooooooo nasty and muddy. We had to move to an alternate field, which wasn't the same size. So, they lined it out and put flags up where the goals should be. It was a smaller field than usual, too. Add to this, we're playing the Howard Dean of the local soccer association. This coach is so absolutely nuts and over the top, that we can't help but laugh. The kids got behind 1-0 and then tied it back up. At halftime, it was 1-1. We wound up coming back and beating them 5-1. I wish I had a video camera for this one stunt Coach Howard Dean pulled. His team missed a shot on goal wide and the coach did this Chris Farley "living in a van down by the river" move as he let out this whoop of disappointment similar to that of Muslim women in mourning before he started this high-stepping march run thing down the field. Our entire sideline burst forth with laughter. I almost couldn't contain myself I was laughing so hard. Coach Army of Dad missed it because he was watching the team play. Gees, it was funny. Boo's best friend, AH, is on Coach Dean's team this year and came to spend the night with us tonight. I asked him how he liked his new coach and he told me: "Well, he gets kind of excited. Today, he did this thing where he was yelling and running down the sidelines like this *AH demonstrates the move*. Its kind of embarrassing." I almost peed my pants from laughing. My kiddo played pretty good today and came close to scoring a goal. That is his goal, so to speak. He REALLY wants to score. We'll see what we can do for him.

Army of Dad was thrilled by this victory. If there was any single coach whose team he wanted to beat, it was this team. So, we were glad about it. But, these slow starters and close starts are going to give Army of Dad an aneursym. One parent on our team made a very funny comment about our coach having some competition for the loudest coach in the soccer association. I know you'll all be surprised that AoD yells alot. He isn't mean to the boys, but he is loud. We're all loud in this family. Again, another shocker.

We had pictures with the 5-year-olds' team. Nothing better than a muddy day to have pictures. They barely made it without being covered in mud. I mean, come on. Six.5-year-old.boys.Mud. What do you think is going to happen? We had time between pics and the game, so I brought stuff to make sandwiches and we sat in the minivan listening to Rage Against the Machine, Chevelle and other various artists on the Edge while we ate our sandwiches and chips and people-watched. Our observations were keen:
*Chinese women can't park or drive very well.
*One stupid woman had big Texas hair and was wearing high-heeled cowboy boots to the muddy soccer fields. Poor choice of footwear. Not a good choice of hairstyles either.
*Some people do a poor job of supervising their children in parking lots.
*Some people are assholes and block the driveway for no good reason.
*That woman had really large boobs.

The baby napped while we were in the van, too. That gave her a second wind, although, when we got to the field, it was a big pile of mushy soupy mud right in front of one of the goals. Fortunately, the field adjacent wasn't in use, so we convinced the other coach and the ref to move the game over to the better field. While we were moving, I noticed that the baby was burning up. She had a fever. I unbundled her a bit and she laid in my arms most of the game. We played a team that had three of our former players on it. Two of them were pretty good, too. They only beat us 4-0, which I thought was pretty good considering we have five boys who have never played before. One is a little chubby kid who spends most of his time yelling to his dad in the stands; one kid who barely speaks English and looks like Droopy the dog; another kid who NEVER listens; one kid who was watching everything but the game; another kid who was doing pretty good; and our kid. Hot Rod does pretty good, but he likes to kick the ball out of bounds for some reason, instead of kicking it towards the goal. *shaking my head* We'll work on that. AoD actually broke a pen in his hand without realizing it because the kids were killing him by not listening.

I noticed a bulge in my tire while we were in the parking lot. We come home, I take Stinkerbelle's temp and it is 101.6 in her ear. I choke some baby Tylenol down her and hit the road from the tire store. One of the tires had bit the dust. Something about me probably hitting a curb and busting the lining. ? Anyway. Two of the tires were bald. So, we just replaced all four and got my car aligned while we were there. I took a nap on the couch in the waiting room. I was there more than two hours and slept about two hours of that time. It was nice to nap. So, that sucked. Evidently, Stinkerbelle napped while I was gone, too. She slept even longer than me. She got some more Tylenol later even though her temp was down to 98.6. She just didn't seem to be feeling well, so I wanted to give her some relief. We'll see how it goes.

We did pizza tonight. Yummy. I ate one slice too much, though. Blech. Burping up bacobits taste. We had a bacon and hamburger pizza. We introduced AH to the brilliant humor of MXC. Boo already loves it. He and AH laughed like crazy. It was as much fun to listen to them as it is to watch the show. They had a burping contest earlier during the pizza meal. Even fever-infested Stinkerbelle was laughing. *shaking my head* Boys.


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