Army of Mom

So this is how liberty dies ... with thunderous applause.

3.09.2006

Changing my job title

I would like to resign from my position as "keeper of all things" in the Army household. I am putting in my two weeks notice.

I have enjoyed working for Army of Dad, Pickle, Hot Rod and Stinkerbelle, but I believe my skill set would be better served in a home where I'm in charge of fewer things.

Thank you for the comaraderie, love and low pay (or no pay).

I must apologize for failing to load the tee in the car with the other equipment for tee-ball practice last night. I have sufficiently flogged myself and ironed my hands ala Dobby style.

In an effort o redeem myself, I have located the lost ball for Stinkerbelle this morning in the pantry. Hot Rod's inflatable basketball is on top of the closet in the front room by my decorative display of antique children's items and Pickle's Gameboy is in the minivan. I finally located the $59 flashlight after envisioning the ass-chewing that would come had I lost it.

That was the last thing I could handle. Again, it is has been a pleasure serving the family. However, I'd like to take a break for some personal time. On second thought, I'm not putting in my two weeks. I quit today.

Signed simply, Army of Mom, no longer keeper of all things

4 Comments:

  • At 1:44 PM, March 09, 2006, Anonymous Army of Dad said…

    I could have told you where the basketball was. To be fair the kids lose their own things, you take mine and "put them away".

    The flashlight you took so you could buy new batteries for it (so you can show the sales clerk what kind of batteries they are since they are not a common size). So bite me!

    BTW the kids and I are not going to accept your resignation, consider it rejected.

     
  • At 3:12 PM, March 09, 2006, Anonymous KR said…

    AoM, I am heading to Colorado tomorrow for a fun week of skiing...come on...I have room. I will be by to pick you up about 7 pm.

     
  • At 3:29 PM, March 09, 2006, Anonymous Army of Dad said…

    Sorry KR, out of state travel is not authorized during sports seasons.

     
  • At 2:18 PM, March 15, 2006, Blogger Army of Mom said…

    I keep trying to quit and he won't let me.

     

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