Army of Mom

So this is how liberty dies ... with thunderous applause.


65 things I hate

Don't know why this came to mind, but seemed like the thing to do to match the mood I'm in today.

1. smoking
2. standing three feet away from a smoker and smelling them
3. litter
4. litterbugs
5. people who drive slow in the fast lane
6. people who don't turn their blinkers off
7. people who flip others off in traffic. Real classy.
8. The Yankees
9. The blog-whose-name-we-don't-mention
10. small-minded people
11. hypocrites
12. liars
13. passive agressive people who act as if they like you, then stab you in the back
14. running out of deoderant
15. bad dreams
16. when the Bears lose to the Longhorns in the bottom of the ninth by one run
17. being forgetful
18. when my kids are sad
19. when my kids are fighting
20. when my brother gets suicidal
21. when my mom doesn't take her medication
22. when Army of Dad is mad at me
23. not having enough money to pay all the bills
24. not getting to spend as much time with my family and friends as I'd like to
25. working on a pretty day
26. when my Internet goes down
27. when the catheter in my chest hurts
28. potholes
29. The Oakland Raiders
30. teams changing their cities as often as Paris Hilton sucks dudes off on video
31. the fact that the Army doesn't pay its soldiers more
33. the hockey strike
34. not being able to soak in a hot bath
35. yeast infections
36. women who let their flabby arms blow in the wind
37. shark attacks at the beach
38. people who leave their babies or animals in hot cars
39. people who sneak up behind me
40. that smell in the kitchen when a sippy cup of milk is left out for a few days
41. Coachway Inn in Luling, Texas
42. the cost of taking my family to a Rangers game
43. T.O.
44. getting stuck watching Blackhawk Down, Starship Troopers or The Godfather when AoD has the remote control
45. cold french fries
46. $7.50 movie tickets
47. brown recluse spiders
48. the not-really-whistling-but-blowing-air-out-of-his-nose-sound being made by the guy in the next cube over
49. Robin Ventura
50. missing my favorite TV shows
51. Mike Tyson
52. weeds in my garden and yard
53. priests (or anyone, for that matter) who molest kids
54. bad breath
55. taxes
56. mosquito bites
57. cold baths
58. mopping
59. the smell of tuna fish
60. that Richard dork on Beauty and The Geek
61. when my tinney shoes (sneakers to you yankees) get worn out
62. making mistakes
63. the toothpaste residue my kids leave in the sink
64. getting up early in the mornings
65. people who bitch too much and make lists of things they hate


  • At 3:58 PM, June 27, 2005, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    AoM's #66: The Denver Broncos

  • At 4:38 PM, June 27, 2005, Blogger Uzz said…

    How can you hate the Denver Broncos:-) Romonowski has been gone like 100 years now!!! Go Cowboys!!! Go Texans!!! Go Broncos!!! Though I agree with the Raiders.

  • At 10:33 PM, June 27, 2005, Blogger Army of Mom said…

    I struggled with listing either the Broncos or Elway, but I thought the Raiders and T.O. were enough for football.

  • At 9:17 AM, June 28, 2005, Blogger Gadfly said…

    By the way, that's "tennis shoes" for those keeping score at home.

    PS: I'm still freaked out over your brown recluse. I'm thinking about finding some of those sticky pads just in case.

    If God so loved the world that he gave his only begotten son, then why the hell didn't he get rid of brown recluse spiders?

  • At 12:08 PM, June 28, 2005, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Gadfly, don't forget black widows (like you could forget!). Or water moccasins-those are some nasty f-ers.

  • At 12:27 PM, June 28, 2005, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Love the list. I got one.
    People with 0 children, trying to tell you how to raise yours.

  • At 1:37 PM, June 28, 2005, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Or just as good, people with one kid claiming they know all about raising every kid. Man, I had no idea how different every kid would be.

  • At 1:54 PM, June 28, 2005, Blogger Army of Mom said…

    Yeppers. But, I said lots of things that "my children will never do" when I'm a parent.

    Ha. They've done all of them and then some. Kids have a way of making us make asses of ourselves and eat our own words.


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