Army of Mom

So this is how liberty dies ... with thunderous applause.


Up on the rooftop

I keep thinking of the Christmas Song of "Up on the Rooftop" right now. While sitting at the computer, I heard the clinks, clunks and choruses of muffled curses as Dave and Mike - the AC guys - are hard at work demolishing the Junkitrol furnace which gave a dedicated 20 years of heating to the two-story green house in North Texas. I would like to offer a eulogy for old Junky and his also dearly departed mate, the unknown AC brand. They both worked as hard as they could to be crappy builder-grade units. For close to 20 years, they chugged and whirred and increased my utility bills because they weren't made for a house this size. I hope they finally get an eternal rest in that great utility utopia where unwanted and broken units go for eternity. May their rust not corrode and their gears not be pooped on by seagulls.

And, because I keep thinking of the Christmas song ... I created my own version for the occasion:
Up in the ceiling
muffled cuss
out goes crappy old Junkitrol
down the stairway with lots of dust
out to the curb and into the truck

Ho, ho, ho!
I want it to go!
Ho, ho, ho!
I want it to go!
Up in the ceiling
Smack, smack, smack
down the stairway, get it out quick!

*yikes, in the middle of my song I hear BANG! BANG! BANG! and shit goes flying through the vent in the ceiling near my desk. At least I didn't hear a really loud profanity and see a foot come through the ceiling! Back to the song:

First comes the unit in the room of Stinkerbelle
Oh, dear Mike and Dave
Remove it well
Don't eff her room up
It is already messy as hell
Get it out quickly
and watch out for the nails

Repeat Chorus

Next comes the AC
outside the house
please don't track mud
and be a louse
Here is a hammer
And lots of tacks
Also a dustrag
And lots of sacks

Repeat Chorus


Post a Comment

<< Home