Mom my Ride

Ok, this may be my new resolution for the year - NOT to let my ride look so mommed. My kids love this, but I don't think they truly appreciate the humor like I do.

AoM's Year in Review

In examining my resolutions for 2007 I accomplished several. I vowed to read more and I did that. I kicked ass at setting my priorities and making time for important things. I have done that. More time with my kids. More time with my husband and a little more time with my friends (can you say cruise to Mexico with LaLa). Think that was a big old check mark. I failed miserably at getting organized, conquering procrastination and exercising. I had mediocre success with setting and sticking to a budget. Someone else tell me if I became a better person, I'm not thinking there is any difference. I'm as sweet as I ever was. :) Good housekeeping? Maybe it was a smidgen better. And as far as taking care of myself better, I think I did that (again, can we say girls' cruise to Mexico?)

A look back at the highlights of 2007 month by month:
January - kids sick for more than a week, two snow days (in Texas! incredible)
February - the urge to write a book kicked in, more snow, visit from Stinkerbelle's godmother and AoD's dad and grandma (this was a HUGE highlight for the family in '07)
March - UNT Mean Green makes the NCAA tournament, the girls' cruise, ninth anniversary, car accident caused by old bitty,
April - Hot Rod's first confession, another Rangers opening day, the floods in Denton that almost got to our house, yet another sugery, this one to remove my gallbladder. Thinking back, I have had at least one surgery a year since 2001. WTF? My husband is going to trade me in for a new model soon.
May - find out I almost died during my routine surgery, hot Rod's first communion, the end of AoD's years coaching the Sonics soccer team
June - our bad news Bears finishing third in the league's city tournament, my parents' 50th wedding anniversary and their party
July - the last of three years of running soccer camp, Little Bit's stage debut, the final book of Harry Potter
August - the end of Stuff Portrait Friday, taking Pickle to his first live concert to see Weird Al Yankovic, my car was broken into and my purse stolen, my 20th class reunion
September - anime fest, Pickle's 13th birthday
October - million blog hits in my three years of blogging, my baby girl turned 5, my eldest has officially got his first girlfriend, meeting R2D2, going to the Cowboys-Vikings game, going to Disney World and staying at the resort with AoD's family
November - my national board meeting in Margaritaville, my 39th birthday, mom's successful open heart surgery to repair her valve
December - Pickle's first date, the holidays, Hot Rod being a stinkbug at school, falling in love with my husband all over again

As far as resolutions, I only have a few:
1. improve my health by eating better and exercising more (yeah right)
2. start writing more
3. stop saying 'shut up' to people
4. continue working on improving the finances and budget
5. be a better person

Happy New Year everyone. Make sure to eat your black eyed peas for a prosperous new year.

When the lights go out, you'll understand

*shuddering* Good.song.

Rough start to the day

Ever have one of those mornings when everything seems right with the world and then, it just plummets for the sewers?

Welcome to my world.

I had a few tasks to complete at home, then I'm going to celebrate with my mom and she is going to keep the kids so I can go out with Army of Dad.

Then, my next-door neighbor comes over to return the newspaper she borrowed from me. Appears she wanted to read about her car accident in the paper. She was sideswiped on the interstate by a dude having a seizure. Totalled her car. She's a single mom who struggles month to month as it is, but now her paid off Ford Escort is in pieces at a towing business. Worst part is the same thing happened to her four years ago. She was just in the wrong place at the wrong time and totalled her minivan then. Fortunately, she is safe and was last time, too. But, it is hard to look on the bright side. I'm so impressed that she is still smiling and moving forward.

While finishing up some work this morning, I have a voicemail from my brother. He's in tears and says he has bad news. Of course, my fingers are struggling to dial the phone to call him back. He's suffered from depression and has been suicidal at several times in the past, so I'm freaked out. Turns out his ex-wife is seriously dating and he just found out and is devastated. They've been divorced for probably three or four years, but he was holding out hope that she'd take him back some day. He went from earning six figures and living in 3,000 SF homes to now renting a one-bedroom apartment and taking out payday loans to cover his rent. So, he is hurting.

Looks like I may need a few drinks tonight when we go out. That is, if I'm not afraid of the next bad thing to happen. These things happen in threes, you know.

*sigh*

A special day

Today is a special day in our family each year. For me, this day marks my mother's 69th birthday. She is recovering well from her open heart surgery and mitral valve repair. She still gets pretty tired, but I'm amazed she is up and at 'em as well as she is just six weeks or so after the surgery. We're going to take a german chocolate cake down to her to celebrate and then she is babysitting my young 'uns. Awww. I'm so generous - giving her my children on her birthday. :)

Today is also a special day for Army of Dad's parents. They will celebrate their 35th wedding anniversary today. We're both fortunate to still have both of our parents in relatively good health. So, raise a glass for the folks for us when you celebrate this year.

Love Hate Relationship

Ok, another one of those songs. *sigh* It is probably really an awful song to associate good sex with ... but, you know me ... if the video is disturbing, the lyrics very weird ... all the better. Pull my hair and we're almost there. Gees, I shouldn't blog this late at night while listening to this stuff. I say things I really don't want my inlaws to read this. Hey, mom-in-law, please cover your eyes and plug your ears. As the Madagascar penguins would say "You didn't see anything!"

Santa Claus Came to Town

Happy post-Christmas to each of you. Did I post this picture? I can't even remember because the anticipation of the holidays, deadlines, activities, etc, just made it damn near impossible to get everything done and I didn't get everything done. My bathroom is still gross and has a stack of cleaners sitting in the floor just teasing me every time I take a whiz and don't clean. And, heck, I've forgotten what I was supposed to get done. Anyway. These are the children with the Santa at Cabela's in Fort Worth. He's a good one with his own beard. Little Bit kept stroking it. She thought it was pretty cool. Just last year, she wouldn't get near the same Santa and would only get in the picture if Mrs. Claus was there. Brings back memories. When she was 2, she called him Ho Ho. She worshipped him from afar. So, Santa came and went. In his wake, there are remnants of tape and wrapping paper in the freshly vaccuumed floor. There is icing and dirty dishes, pots and pans in the kitchen. There is a turkey torso in the beer fridge waiting to be picked clean and turned into turkey soup. So much to do and no desire to do it. I just want to bask in the glow of Little Bit playing with her Disney princess lip gloss rings, Hot Rod's World PeaceKeepers blowing up the princess dolls and Pickle with Ipod buds popped into his ears casting sideways looks at the annoying younger siblings who can't understand the angst that goes with being 13. Oh yeah, and Army of Dad parading around the house in his new No. 28 Adrian Peterson jersey. Yeah, I scored bonus points with that one. Now, if I can learn how to work my new GPS navigation device, perhaps I won't call Army of Dad to help me find my way in Houston when he's in Dallas because I'm lost. We'll see if I can overcome my technology challenges to work the damn thing. Now, his Christmas Eve gift for me - which wasn't opened in front of the children or folks - that I can manage to work just fine.

Merry Starry Christmas

When you go outside tonight to try and spy Santa flying by, make sure to look toward the moon and enjoy the spectacular view of Mars. We saw it last night. The moon was full and gorgeous and there appeared to be a bright star just below it from our view in Texas. It is Mars and it is beautiful. Enjoy!

Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night.

I was Eddie Haskelled

It's true. I was Eddie Haskelled to the max this week. I'm so embarrassed that I fell for it. There is one child Hot Rod associates with at school. The first time I laid eyes on this kid, I didn't care for him and felt like he was bad news. Then, he wore a John Cena T-shirt to school one day and that sort of confirmed it for me. Not a good influence.

But, at the field trip on Tuesday, Eddie Haskell hung around Hot Rod. I got the yes ma'am, no ma'am. Oh you're right, ma'am. When we went through the life of Christ display at the house of wax, he knew the Bible stories and talked about church. It gave me pause. His mom listens to the Harry Connick Jr. Christmas album, too, he told me. He gets a whooping if he lies, he said. Ok, maybe this child isn't the bad influence I initially thought and perhaps I misjudged his character.

Uh, no.

Today, I get the call that my son was chasing girls at recess and saying something about humping them. WTF? So, the assistant principal puts me on speaker phone with Hot Rod. She informs me that he and another boy (hmm, let me guess who) had been doing this. So, I asked her what was said because 'hump' is not a word that is said in our house (even behind closed doors, eww) and that he hasn't learned about the birds and the bees, so there is certainly no way he knows what this means.

Asst. principal: Well, he said something about lovely ladies come and hump this or something to that effect.
AoM: Oh gees. That is my fault.
*crickets chirping*
AoM: Those are some of the lyrics to the Black-Eyed Peas' song My Hump. *best part is here when I started singing the song to the asst. principal*
Asst. principal: Ok, what is the name of the band and the song again?
AoM: *repeating information* And, Hot Rod, you know that is inappropriate, right?
Hot Rod: Yes *stifling back the tears* I just wanted the girls to chase me.

*shaking my head* The apple doesn't fall far from the tree, does it, hon? *sighing* Fortunately, the school is punishing him, but they have taken the "boys will be boys" theory and his teacher told me "remember, you'll really laugh at this----someday!"

The best news about the situation, as far as Hot Rod is concerned, is that he told the truth from the start about what he did and why he did it. Both the assistant principal and teacher praised him for that. Eddie Haskell? Nope. Lied the whole way. Another reason I feel stupid for falling for the whole good manners routine on the field trip. You know, I'm sort of hoping he was telling the truth about getting a whoopin' for lying. Just like Ralphie said in A Christmas Story "somewhere, Schwartz was getting his." Today, I'm hoping Eddie Haskell is getting his.

My Favorite Christmas Songs

Was switching Christmas CDs in the minivan during a traffic jam on Tuesday and it started me thinking about my favorite Christmas songs. Here are the ones that come to the forefront:

Ave Maria by Luciano Pavarotti

There is almost a tie between The Christmas Song by Nat King Cole and The Christmas Song by Mel Torme. I still lean toward Nat King Cole.

Any classical version of Greensleeves

White Christmas by Bing Crosby

O Holy Night. This version by Josh Groban is a nice one.

More contemporary favorites:

Christmas (Baby, Please Come Home) by u2

Christmas in Hollis by Run DMC

Santa Claus is Back in Town by Elvis Presley and Blue Christmas by Elvis. I loved my Elvis Christmas cassette tape. (boy, that dates me, doesn't it?)

Christmas Wrapping by The Waitresses

Merry Effing Christmas by Mr. Garrison (I'm sorry, you had to expect something obviously not family friendly from me)

A tribute to Tony Romo - his little wench singing Let it Snow. I prefer Harry Connick Jr.'s and Ottmar Liebert's versions, but she is pretty. I joked that Jessica willed Romo to fail on Sunday, so someone else could 'go down' for a change. :) Sorry. Bad pun.

Hidee Ho

It's Mr. Hankey, the Christmas Poo.

Waxy build-up

Some of the best stuff included the ones where the museum tourists could get into the show. Here is Hot Rod on the Letterman show.

And, giving knuckle bumps to Dr. Phil.

Johnny Depp. As long as he keeps his political views to himself, he is alright by me. I can just look at him. Check out the hands and arms on this figure. They really are amazingly realistic.

Me and Oprah. It turned out blurry because Hot Rod is not the greatest of photographers yet.

Some of the wax museum stuff was cool. Some was really cheesey, like the Star Trek get-up. Check out Uhura in the back: she lost her head. It was on the found at her feet.

Hanging around

There are moments when cleaning my house doesn't seem so bad. I could ge this dude hanging from a crane spray-washing the roof.

Best Christmas Gifts

I don't need anything else. My best gifts. Ever.

Be vewy, vewy quiet

I'm hunting for Santa. Heh hehe heheh eheheh ehhhhh. Cabela's always has a great Santa. So, we trekked out to do some shopping and see Santa Claus. Can't beat that. Of course, the boys found the Red Ryder BB gun, such as that featured in A Christmas Story and I thought I'd never pry those goodies from their hands. I'm thinking they may get one for Christmas 2008. Of course, they had to recite all the dialog from the movie, too. Never thought I'd tire of hearing it.

I'm going to be sad when Pickle feels he's too big for Santa pictures. But, he is my kid, so that day may never come.

Merry Christmas Ya'll

This was at the Christmas tree farm earlier this month. But, I thought it was a very Texas-looking Christmas. We have these ghostly pumpjacks littered across the state as a reminder of the past.

By the way, it is late, but Happy Birthday, Cuz!

Party girl

Today was Little Bit's Christmas party at pre-school. We were still missing a few kids, but this is most of them. Too cute. Little Bit loves that dress, so I figure I might as well let her wear it as much as she can before the holidays are over. I got it at Kohl's after Christmas last year. It is SOOOOO cute. I like her friend with the Rudolph nose on the far left. Kids are so funny. The kid on the front row in the Santa hat - the white part of the hat is a snowman face. I love it. I wish the picture showed it. But, it might be a good thing it didn't since he was blowing giant snot bubbles from his nose during story time. *shuddering* I missed most of the party so I could go on the field trip with Hot Rod. I hate making choices like that.

Effective marketing?

I just laugh every time I pass this sign. Is it really an effective marketing tool to offer a free T-shirt with every release? I mean, seriously. I can see it now. Some frat boy from UNT is arrested for PI or something equally stupid, so he calls the frat house to see if the guys can bail him out. Here's the conversation:

Frat Boy 1: Dude, come bail me out of jail. The 5-0 got me.
Frat Boy 2: *hollering to other guys in frat house* Dude, Skip got arrested. Which bail bonds place is it that will give us a free shirt if we use 'em?

Jesus H. Christ.

Pucker Up, Buttercup

Ever wandered what an asshole looked like? Here are two. The dude in the green sedan on the right is being a douchebag by rushing around everyone on the right to cut in line. Then, the maroon SUV in front of me wouldn't be kind and take turns as we had to merge onto the highway from the access road. It was a warm day and we were pretty much going nowhere (maybe 2 mph from time to time), so everyone had their windows rolled down. I looked over at this person and I'm incensed. I yell "That is not very kind! I hope you have a merry Christmas with that attitude!" Now, that will tell them. *shaking my head* Wow. AoM telling people off in traffic. You people better back off. I'll get out a can of mom-speak for you. The Whoop-Ass is still in the bag in the back of the mom-mobile just waiting for the douchebags from the Cowboys game. *sigh* It really was rude of both of these people. To give you an idea of just how still we were sitting, I actually put pictures in my photo album while sitting in traffic. You can see the cars on the right on the access road all bottle-necked, too. By the time I got to the accident, it was cleaned up, but the dumbass public servants still had the road down to only one lane. Great job, Deputy Dawg. Wouldn't want traffic to unwind. You just keep on shooting the breeze with Barney Fife over there. In the meantime, I'm making friends with some guys in a lawncare truck, who by the way, kindly let me in front of them.

Must.Press.Button

Ok, so I'm easily persuaded to do stupid things. This is like the ultimate WT thing to put in a bathroom. So, of course, I was drawn to it. Mesmerized even. The boys told me there was one in the men's room, too. Make sure you turn your volume up for the full WT effect. This was at the Ripley's/Wax museum today. That is my stubby little finger pushing the button over and over. I made sure the place was empty before I did it. I have my standards.

Wow

Ok, so we had the ultimate WT field trip today to the Ripley's Believe It or Not/Wax Museum. Yeah, seriously. Anyway. I was totally amazed at some of these things. The one that probably blew me away the most was this one. A painting done in 52 seconds and it is pretty good. It is about an 8x10, give or take a few inches. But, to have done this in less than a minute was nothing short of miraculous. I couldn't do this with months of work. Ok, maybe if it was a paint by numbers, I could.

Ants in the Pants

This video makes me laugh out loud whenever I see it. Not one of the girls is doing the same thing. Some of them look like they have to pee. Others are just beebopping around. My own daughter is doing a version of her pigeon-toed dance thing. Then, you see the teacher and what they are actually supposed to be doing and that makes it even funnier to me.

Furry feet lovers

I'm having a hankering for a hobbit flick.

Looks like Peter Jackson kissed and made up with studio officials: he'll produce two Hobbit movies. Hooray!!!!

Christmas meme

1. Wrapping or gift bags? Whatever is handy. We re-use bags year after year, but whenever I run out, I rely on wrapping paper. Plus, for kids, it is more fun to rip through wrapping paper on Christmas morning.

2. Real or artificial tree? real. Something about going to a tree farm and picking out a good one. Plus the great smell in the house.

3. When do you put up the tree? Whenever we can between the Friday after Thanksgiving and Dec. 10.

4. When do you take the tree down? New Year's Day, despite the grumbles of my husband and the Epiphany, wisemen, etc.

5. Do you like eggnog? ick, no.

6. Favorite gift received as a child? still thinking it was my Barbie mall with escalator.

7. Do you have a Nativity scene? Yes. A Precious Moments full set that I got in high school with money earned working at the AMC Green Oaks 8 movie theater. :) I added pieces over the years.

8. Worst Christmas gift you ever received? not sure about this. My mom got a bagel slicer last year. I think that counts.

9. Mail or email Christmas cards? mail

10. Favorite Christmas movie?A Christmas Story

11. When do you start shopping for Christmas? day after Christmas, year before

12. Favorite thing to eat at Christmas? cornbread stuffing and gravy

13. Clear lights or colored on the tree? whatever we have, usually color

14. Favorite Christmas song? The Christmas Song and Ave Maria

And now, for the disclaimer:

1. Link to the person that tagged you, and post the rules on your blog.

2. Share Christmas facts about yourself. check

3. Tag random people at the end of your post, and include links to their blogs.

Missing JT Snow - she already did it. HA!

Just Us Autries - already did it, double HA!

Six Degrees of Blondeness - ok, she's gotta do it now

4. Let each person know that they have been tagged by leaving a comment on their blog. check

5. Send NDT some Christmas cookies, dammit. Uh, no.

Out of the mouths of babes

Watching celebrity birthdays on Fox 4 news this morning and Christina Aguilera had a birthday today. When her picture popped up with this hairstyle, Hot Rod let out an audible grossed out gasp. UGH! She's gotta be 40!

Just goes to show that hairstyle makes a difference, huh?

On a different note, there are lots of skanky pictures of this hoochie mama on the Internet.

Bow chinky bow wow

I wish I had a really good picture of Kyle Orton from the Vikes-Bears game tonight. Swear to God, dude looks like a cheesey 70s porn star with the big bushy mustache. Apparently, he is known for the mustache and for his lack of shaving and even for a neck beard. That's just funny.

On a weirder note, I went into a Whataburger tonight to eat for the first time in a number of years. Seems like the more things change, the more they stay the same. In Whataburger with me was a couple smooching at one table and a dude with a can of beer at another table. Ah yes.

For all you Scrooges

Sometimes, I get caught up in my very own pity party. Army of Dad and I had a spat this morning. The words stung and hit way too close to home. So, I lost my cool. I try not to argue most of the time other than the little snipping and sniping and smartassy things we say to each other. I try to avoid the full-blown arguments. This morning, I didn't do so well. Then, the pity party set in. It's Christmas time, not a time to fight, I kept telling myself. Tears welled up several times, but I try not to cry. It is something I've taught myself over the years. I refuse to do the emotional blackmail anymore. When I finally cry, it is obvious that something is really wrong.

But, I got past it. Gave myself the day off and permission to watch the Cowboys lose, eat cereal for supper and play computer Solitaire all afternoon.

Tonight, as I was catching up on the things I need to do, like work and dishes, I was cruising around to blogs I like to read, but don't get to frequently enough.

Get out your hankies. Even if you're a Scrooge, this one will bring tears to your eyes. If you didn't believe in Santa before, you'll believe in him now. To all those Santa's helpers out there - you do God's work.

Go see what A Storm in Afghanistan had to say about his late wife's visit with Santa.

God love him and his children. I only hope I know half the love in my marriage that he clearly knew with his beloved.

Object in link may appear larger ...

Look, a tree almost as big as mine: live video of the tree in Rockefeller Center.

:) I kept cracking this joke during the Giants-Redskins game whenever they'd show the tree. The link is great if you want some holiday music at your computer. It is a live video feed with Christmas tunes playing. Very peaceful. The tree is gorgeous right now (evening) all lit with the flags blowing in the high winds.

Merry Christmas.

Bonanza

Ohmygosh. Every Saturday and Sunday afternoon on Channel 39, I would watch the old westerns. My favorite was the Rifleman, but Bonanza was a close second. I had a cousin who was a manager at a Bonanza steakhouse. Anyone remember those? But, I loved Trapper John, MD, aka, Pernell Roberts. Little Joe was so handsome. And, I had an elementary school principal who called every little boy Hoss. Oh yeah, and there was HopSing. Boy, you could get away with that or even the Ancient Chinese Secret today without people being all up in arms and crying into their rice and soy sauce. I loved these shows. Oh yeah, there was Big Valley and the Lone Ranger. I think Gunsmoke came on at 7 p.m. on Channel 11. My dad used to joke about being Festus.

The Limp Dicks - Viva Viagra!

It is sort of beyond comment. I'm sure The King is rolling over in his grave right now. I hope Priscilla or Lisa Marie or whoever owns Elvis song rights is happy with themselves right now. *shaking my head*

The Three Wisecrackers

Here are the children in front of the big-ass tree that dominates our front room at the moment. We left the house a week ago with 84 degree temps at our home. An hour later and 60 miles west and the temps had dropped to about 60 or so. I had cleaned out all the jackets and coats from the car, so there weren't enough jackets for the all the kids. Hot Rod and his German/Dutch (from Minnesota) blood, he was happy with no jacket. Pickle wore little brother's hoodie, which explains the short sleeves.

This was Little Bit's pose. She wanted to make this face. It works for her, though, with those big brown eyes.

Hot Rod just has that All American look with blond hair and blue eyes. He's my Eddie Haskell.
Pickle and his Mavericks Santa hat. He loves that thing.

This image just melted my heart. Pickle is really nurturing (at times) with his sister. Other times, he calls her pure evil. *shaking my head* That tree is enormous. I still can't believe we bought a 17 foot tree. We had to cut a foot off so it wouldn't whack the ceiling.

And, the three of them walking by through the tree farm.

O Christmas Tree, O Christmas Tree

Christmas song in honor of the tree:
On the first day of Christmas, my true love gave to me: One giant effing tree!!!!

Look at the monster tree we cut down in BFE.

I'm speaking in rhyme, because now it's time to relax after making deadline.

17 feet caused my husband to bleat and curse as the tree rubbed the popcorn finish off the ceiling (Ok, I could find a rhyme here, sue me).

Ok, enough of that. This was at the hole in the wall restaurant in the suburbs of BFE. We even found a Starbucks out in the sticks. Army of Dad looked at me and said "they really are everywhere."

Ahhh, peppermint mocha.

Ancient Chinese Secret

Does anyone else remember this commercial besides me? It was one of my favorites as a kid.

Taking deep breaths

You may have noticed the lack of any worthwhile posts. I'm terribly sorry about that. December is the busiest month of the year for me. Between all the holiday stuff and children's things, there is also that little irritation of work. For whatever reason, I get bombarded with any number of assignments from multiple magazines all at the same time. Then, on top of all that, I had the editor from hell who just couldn't ever be satisfied with this one piece I turned in. Finally, after five rounds of revisions, he was satisfied. But, did he say 'good work' or 'thanks for doing all of this'? Nope. Nada. Jerk.

Then, I'm the president of a local professional organization and because they all know I blog, I was volunteered to be the national blog chairwoman. Ok, that was intimidating enough, but I can do it and once I got over the daunting task ahead of me, I embraced the idea of it. Now, I have some of the staff people for the organization taking it upon themselves to change what I was doing - even though the national board president gave me free reign over the blog - and it is just pissing me off beyond belief. Plus, instead of coming to me to let me know he had an issue about what I was doing, he went to another staffer to complain. Now, I don't know if she is a bitch or if she was wanting to let me know that the other guy is a jerk, but she forwarded me his email to her and included the national blog committee members and the national president in the email. ARGH! Office politics. This is one reason I like working for myself. My boss is a bitch, but she cuts me some slack now and then. *yes, that was meant to a joke, please laugh*

*taking deep breaths*

ARGH! I'm so fed up with other people right now. I have cookies to bake, pies to make, presents to wrap and bills to pay. Oh yeah, and stories to write. Calgon, take me away!

All I Want for Christmas Is My Two Front Teeth

I got a Christmas card today from my sister-in-law in Indiana. In it was an adorable picture of my two nephews and niece. She is missing her two front teeth and looks precious. I cracked up and this song has been running through my mind all evening long.

I'm Dreaming of a White Christmas

I love the old Bing Crosby holiday movies. I can remember curling up in the recliner as a girl and watching them every year. I bought "Crooners at Christmas" after Christmas last year on sale and popped it in the CD player at the computer while I work. I have Dean Martin, Bing Crosby, Perry Como and more. Now, I just need some hot chocolate, a fire roaring in the fireplace and my parents screaming at each other to 'go to hell' and it will be just like when I was a girl.

Don't Go Breaking My Heart

It's funny to hear my daughter singing this song from the backseat of the minivan. We checked out the Muppet Show on DVD from the library and the kids' LOVE the episode with Elton John. He sings this song with Miss Piggy on the DVD. Stinkerbelle loves "Elpon John and his crazy glasses." I like Elton John, too. He was singing on the radio when I gave birth to Pickle. I tried to talk Uzz into letting me name the kid Elton John and calling him EJ. He wouldn't go for that. I was telling Pickle that story the other day and he said to remind him to thank his dad. :)

Happy Holidays from Tatooine

I got a few Christmas cards today. One had a Star Wars stamp for the postage.

Nothing says Merry Christmas like a Sith Lord.

Where's Stuart Smalley when you need him?

I'm up to my eyeballs in deadlines about stupid global real estate stuff and Texas construction stuff.

Then, I get a call from an editor. I don't know if he's having a bad day or if I just suck. But, I'm close to tears right now and the stress has embedded in my right shoulder (which was sore from trying to pitch to my son and his friend on Saturday during some batting practice). Anyway. The editor called and chewed my ass about how he doesn't understand what I'm trying to say in my story, how I can't turn in work like this, I'm pushing his timetables, excuses won't work right now, if I get stuck I need to call him, etc. etc. It went on and on and then the condescending nature of his voice made me feel like a 4-year-old who peed in the floor instead of going to use the restroom like a good little girl would do. Seriously.

I'm at my wit's end. I put in a shitload of effort into this story and I take pride in turning in good work. I'm looking at it and thinking, what is missing? But, regardless, I'm trying to do more for it and feeling like a steaming pile of dogdoo in the meantime.

I need some thicker skin.

DONE!

I got the last Christmas card addressed tonight. Hooray! *doing the dance of love*

Now, I'm just waiting for Pickle's karate pictures to arrive in the mail to go into cards for family who don't have the latest pictures of the children.

But, they're done. *exhaling*

Lots going on. No time to blog. *double sigh*

How 'bout them Cowboys? That game made me lose my voice today. I was screaming, I was so excited at that ending.

Got my house mostly clean. That is quite the achievement.

We got the Christmas tree up and decorated.

Made a pumpkin pie.

Still need to mop the kitchen and dining room. Ick.

There is more, but I'm still on my Christmas card completion high and can't think straight.

O Holy Night

One of the most beautiful Christmas songs ever and probably my favorite rendition. This song is my mom's favorite and never fails to bring a tear to my eye.

Winter Wonderland

It is that time of year when I make everyone around me insane. Yes, I'm THAT person. I'm the one who listens to Christmas music all day. I'm the one who cries at the drop of a hat - not because I'm sad, but because I'm filled with so much happiness that I feel sorry for others who aren't as happy as I am. I love this stuff. Our tree went up last night. I found Sounds of the Season digital music channel on our Verizon cable thingee. and, I love Jason Mraz, too, by the way.

Feliz Navitoss

My friend, Chad, sent this one to me and it is definitely blog-worthy.

My Jewish friends aren't offended if I say Merry Chrsitmas just as I'm not offended if they tell me Happy Hannakuh. I even bought and sent some Hannakuh cards last week. *gasp*

So, why is it so hard for retailers to say "Hannakuh sale" or "Christmas sale"? Heck, you can even have a Kwaanza sale if you want to. Don't expect me to be buying mennorahs or the Kwaanza candleabra thingee. But, hey, play to your base.

Anyway, this is a funny little video about a new holiday tradition: Merry Tossmas!

Hump Day

I gave myself the evening off. I think I deserved it. I caught up on Project Runway. I have missed the previous two episodes. I think I deserved to eat a bowl of Cocoa Krispies while watching TV for a few hours. Yeah, the trash needed to be gathered up, but I sent the boys to bed before I remembered. So, up early it will be.

Why did I deserve to veg out tonight? Well, I started off my day with a visit to the OB/GYN for a check under the hood. All is well. Jan. 17 is the tentative date set for my ablation and polyp removal. You know, women my age and all. *sigh* Then, I went straight from the cooch doctor to the dentist for my semi-annual cleaning. I hate that stuff. I REALLY hate that stuff. I have two old fillings (from when I was a kid) that need to be replaced. Recommended that I should get a mouth guard for sleeping because it is pretty clear I grind my teeth while I sleep. Stress and all.

Lastly, totally random stuff: Jason Bateman is totally cute. Work is busy, but I guess that is good.

Merry Christmas, Granny

Christmas is a big deal in my family and my mom was really sad that she wouldn't be able to put up and decorate a tree. Dad wasn't interested in doing one until my mom said she wanted Stinkerbelle to come decorate the tree. Then, dad got one up and got a box of lights and ornaments out for her. She only broke two of them. *sigh* You can tell they're not used to little kids being around anymore. I have very few ornaments that can be broken and they all go at the top of the tree in my home.

Cartman would be proud

For just $6.95, you, too, can be kissing balls.

What would Cartman say?

First love

Pickle took his girlfriend out on Saturday with his kid sister and brother. She was pretty patient with them and seemed to have a good time. Of course, she professed her love in good spirit and Pickle was tremendously embarrassed by it all. We went to CiCi's and then to see Enchanted. She was trying to get him to hold her hand in the movies; she had her hand on the arm rest and a little over it. But, in typical male fashion, he didn't take the hint. I asked him later if he realized she was trying to get him to hold his hand and he said yes. So, why didn't you hold it, I asked him. I dunno. Ahh, yes. He is a young man with a great career in cluelessness lying ahead when it comes to girls and relationships.

Wowza

She may not be bright, but she is one of the prettiest gals around. Jessica Simpson caught my eye this morning because she was at Magic Kingdom on Nov. 30 filming the Disney World Christmas parade to be broadcast on Dec. 25. Anyway, I was flipping through images of her and saw this button-popping pic. Wowzers. Seriously. That button looks like it is gonna give out at any moment. Then what? We throw beads at her?

Look at me, I was right!

Looks like I wasn't totally off base last time I went into Victoria's Secret about how either I'm getting older or the target audience of Victoria's Secret is getting younger. Woo hoo!

The Wall Street Journal printed the following:
As Victoria's Secret prepares for the broadcast of its annual fashion show Tuesday, the brand has made a renewed push for younger customers, including holding auditions for a college student to walk the runway amid its famous supermodels.

Sales at Victoria's Secret have been disappointing throughout this year, hurt by a declining number of mall visitors and fashion miscues at its stores. The company has planned conservatively for the holidays, given shoppers' worries about the economy.

Two weeks ago, Limited Brands Inc., which owns Victoria's Secret and Bath & Body Works, posted a 48% decline in net income ...

African Anteater Ritual

One of my favorite movies from college was "Can't Buy Me Love" starring Patrick Dempsey, AKA Dr. McDreamy. When I went to see "Enchanted" on Saturday, I laughed out loud because - just briefly - while dancing at a ball, I swear to God, I think some of the dancers in the background were doing the African Anteater Ritual. I wanna go see the movie again just to make sure. Oh yeah, and to see the one scene of Patrick in his bathrobe with a hint of chest hair poking out the top.

Swedish Chef: Making Eggs

Nothing will make you giggle like watching your children act out this little scene. Seeing Hot Rod or Stinkerbelle try to "lay an egg" that is a table tennis ball or a bomb is pretty hysterical. I do have to hide the wooden spoons from Pickle, too. *shaking my head* Although it is great that they are watching The Muppet Show and loving it. The library is great. We've been checking out the various DVDs of the first two seasons.

Its a major award

We got out this movie for the first time today. The kids watched it on the way to pick and cut down our tree. WalMart has the leg lamp Christmas ornament. I'm soooo going to get it.

Little Wonders

Just listen to the song. Out of the mouth of the handsome, talented and insightful Rob Thomas. I had an incredible weekend with my family. My eldest had his first "date", we helped my mom and dad decorate their Christmas tree and we went today to select and cut our Christmas tree down (all 17 feet of it -swear to God!)

But, honestly, these small hours are the best ones - with my husband and my kids. I feel so incredibly blessed and, best of all, loved. So incredibly loved.