Army of Mom

So this is how liberty dies ... with thunderous applause.


Books, songs and frizz, oh my

More bizarre outfits and how they inspire me.

This reminds me of something from a Dr. Seuss book.

Would you, could on a catwalk?
I would not, could not on a catwalk.
I would not, could not on a boat dock.
I would not, could not wear yellow bows.
I would not, could not look like a frilly ho.
I do not like all the yellow bows.
I do not like them anorexic, I am.

This one inspires a Bon Jovi song.

Shot to the heart and you're to blame, you give fashion a bad name.

This one, another children's story.

I'll huff and I'll puff and I'll blow your bow down. Although I'm guessing there are some guys who are hungry for pork products right about now. Plus, can you imagine this design (minus the stupid print fabric and ridiculous bow in her hair) on a regular person? Our hips would look four feet wide.

And, lastly, this one inspires me for a hair product commercial:

They look like they've either:
A) just got laid and have that mussy hair from getting into it
B) just woke up after a bender the night before
C) have some seriously dry hair


On the road again

Just can't wait to get on the road again.

My hot chicky mama friend is on her way to get me and should be here any moment. We're stopping to have dinner and a drink and then we're on our way to scenic Enid, Okla., to visit another of my hottie friends. Dammit, I gotta quit having friends that are skinnier and better looking than me.

But, it worked for me in high school because I got their cast-offs, which weren't half-bad. But, that is neither here nor there. I'm excited.

I'll be back Sunday night. I'm sure I'll be tired from getting lit at least once this weekend. Woo hoo. Sans kiddos!!!!! Watch out, Oklahoma! Here comes Army of Mom!


Well, I have been so excited that I'm heading to Oklahoma this weekend (not so much the destination, but the company I'll be keeping.) My best friend from school is coming to get me and we're going to hang out with the third amigo from our junior high years.

We'll have a blast.

Of course, my parade was rained on a bit when a dear friend called to tell me she'd been "reorganized" right out of a job. *sigh* A bit of a buzzkill and I feel really awful that I won't be around this weekend for her.

I may try to get one more blog post in before hitting the road, but it will be sparse in these parts unless Army of Dad can herd the children into a central area and guest blog, but I wouldn't hold my breath on that one.

Coolest video

I don't want to load up the video, but these guys do THE coolest video on treadmills.

Ok Go courtesy of Mazurland.

SPF: Muses

Kristine at Random and Odd has battled motivation issues recently, with good reason, and thought that assigning us the following topic may help her search for her own. She gave us:

1. SomeTHING (not someone) that inspires you to do what you do. (work, hobby, donate, create..whatever)
2. Something you don’t like to read about on blogs.
3. Something that inspires you to write on your blog.

I have been battling deadlines, events and allergies this week, so I had to go back to a CD of pics from earlier this year to see what I could come up.

Something that inspires me to work at losing weight: skinny girls.

This is my skinny pharmacist friend. Our girls go to school and play together. She sends me pics of her and the family on the beach and she's so damn cute (nice, too, so I can't even hate her).

Pickle's tennis coach last time. *sigh*

2. Something I don't like to read about on other blogs: the conspiracy theories about 9/11.

This sculpture was made out of scraps from the WTC. I hate to read blogs that rag on the war on terror and how they think Bush knew about the attacks, etc. I just think it is counterproductive.

3. Something that inspires me to write about on my blog.

I love the funny moments in life. I like to capture images that make the reader smile or think. I like to do that with my posts and stories, too. This was just one of those funny ones at a sci-fi con in October 2005. The baby Chewy was a bit intimidated by R2D2, I think.

So, did you play?


Wonders never cease

After a very VERY rough two weeks for me when I thought I was going to break down and hit up the doc for some Zoloft or something for anxiety, things are finally looking up a bit. I had a meeting I had to speak at tonight and I was only half-assed prepared for it, but I think I did ok. Anyone? Anyone?

But, I digress. I missed my son's baseball game tonight and that broke my heart. I left my minivan for Army of Dad and I hopped in Sex on Wheels to drive to the city for the meeting. He does have his romantic side when he wants to. I get in and the CD begins playing the following Garth Brooks song: She's Every Woman.

She's sun and rain, she's fire and ice
A little crazy but it's nice
And when she gets mad, you best leave her alone
'Cause she'll rage just like a river
Then she'll beg you to forgive her
She's every woman that I've ever known.

She's so New York and then L.A.
And every town along the way
She's every place that I've never been
She's makin love on rainy nights
She's a stroll through Christmas lights
And she's everything I want to do again.

It needs no explanation
'Cause it all makes perfect sense
For when it comes down to temptation
She's on both sides of the fence.

No it needs no explanation
'Cause it all makes perfect sense
When it comes down to temptation
She's on both sides of the fence.

She's anything but typical
She's so unpredictable
Oh but even at her worst she ain't that bad
She's as real as real can be
And she's every fantasy
Lord she's every lover that I've ever had
And she's every lover that I've never had

I came to help restore your pluck

Ack. I have to speak tonight at a professional group and of course I'm not very well prepared and my allergies decided to fight with me yesterday. So, I went to the doctor to get drugs this morning. He gave me a shot and some nasal spray and decongestants. I had to do another cholesterol test to see if that was coming down and I'll be damned if that phlebotomist or whatever she's called did stab the needle through my arm. It stll friggin hurts 90 minutes later.

So, hopefully I can make it through my presentation tonight and sound relatively intelligent and offer something of value to the audience. I'm talking about blogging. Stop laughing, seriously. I'm not sure why anyone there will care, but that is what they asked me to talk about. So, I'm going to give it a shot. Speaking of shots, my hip hurts now, too.

But, I lost a few more pounds. That was nice to see on the scale. Since just before Labor Day, I've now lost about 10 pounds. Since Fourth of July, the weight loss is about 15 or 16 or so. Woo hoo.

Making me sleepy

This looks like the bedspread I had on my bed in 1974. Swear to God.

Only I had a matching pillowsham and not a purse.


Make it work

Well, we have the final four. And, all I can say is *whew.*

I was yelling at the TV when Michael and Jeffrey were left and I thought they were going to boot one of them off the show. I just couldn't believe it. They are the two most talented of any of them. I think Allison should have gotten farther, too. To get booted on the trash challenge was bad, but that is another story.

I'm soooo glad that these four made it. I can't wait to see their collections.

Cuz he's got high hopes

At my boy's birthday party a few weeks back. I love these smiles.

Funny, when I see a mouse, I'm not usually that happy.

Ain't she sweet?

No particular reason. She's just adorable and I need the spunkiness.

For the guys

A little something for the boys.

Guys, did you even notice the stupid bow in her hair? I didn't think so.

Again, you didn't notice the dumb hat, did you? I didn't think so. Those bottoms look uncomfortable to me.

And, this girl looks the healthiest of all these skinny models. She also looks like she could kick my butt with all those muscles.

Blowing the whistle

My hunk of the week fits in with my football fetish. I'm picking smart, attractive lawyer during the day and NFL ref on the weekends.

Ed Hochuli is the only NFL ref I know by name. I had the privilege of watching him call the Texans-Vikings game at Reliant in October 2004. He is a good ref, but he is also adorably handsome.

Check out the guns.

Instead of objecting, I wonder if he ever throws the flag at an opposing attorney in the courtroom?

He can throw his laundry in my direction anytime.


Cheerleader or soccer mom

Hey, I could still be a cheerleader because that looks like the outfit I wear to the soccer fields every Saturday. Only, my visor is a No. 9 Kasey Kahne visor or Texas Rangers visor.

RIP: Golf legend Byron Nelson

Golf legend Byron Nelson died today. Nelson won 11 straight tournament victories in 1945, which is one of sports' most enduring records.

I met Mr. Nelson and interviewed him in 2000 at the Four Seasons in Las Colinas, where the Byron Nelson Classic is held each May. He was one of the most personable celebrities I've ever interviewed. Gracious, courteous, a true Southern gentleman. He held the door open for me as we left the country club and went out onto the green for a photo to accompany the story. He was kind enough to have a photo taken with me, too. My story on Mr. Nelson was the cover story for a special golf pub the business journal put out in time for the Colonial and Byron Nelson Classic. He signed the cover shot for me. It is framed and hanging on my wall.

My brush with greatness. He was so humble and told me stories about how he would work as a caddy when he was a boy, earning a nickel for a day's work. When I met him at the resort, he was bringing in a box of sweaters that he sold in the pro shop there. He had some signature sweaters and sweater vests that he brought in himself. I thought that was surprising. He lived in a Fort Worth suburb and was well liked for his community support. The world will miss him.

Byron Nelson 1912-2006

You've got to change your evil ways

Women like to be "wooed." Did you guys know that? And, a smack on her ass while she's getting you a beer isn't the way to do it.

So, for those of you who are socially stunted or just don't really care since you placed a gold ring on her finger and you figure she's stuck with you, there are ways to brighten the little woman's day. (and, sometimes get a pleasant reward for doing so later in the evening!)

Here are a few suggestions:
1. Bring her flowers for no reason.
2. Tell her she looks pretty.
3. Seduce her. That doesn't mean asking her if she wants to screw. It involves lighting the candles, putting on some Chevelle *or whatever she likes*, brushing your teeth, etc. Then, wrap your arms around her (preferably when she's not doing laundry or dishes) and tell her you're the luckiest man in the world and whisk her to the bedroom.
4. Leave her a love note.
5. Send her a special text message or email during the day just telling her you love her.
6. Hold her hand when you're walking somewhere.
7. Open her car door for her.
8. Tell her she has the night off to go have a cup of coffee and wander the bookstore.
9. Do some of her chores, so she can soak in the tub and paint her nails.
10. Tell her that you love her.

If you do those things, I guarantee you'll have a happier wife. Of course, gifts are always good, but we like to be wanted, desired and loved.

And before anyone (including AoD) reads anything into this, there was no particular reason to write this other than when I pulled up to my house this morning, the FTD truck was in front of my house and I was thinking, "awww, he got me flowers to make up for my shitty week." Then, they went into the house across the street. So, it just got me thinking about nice things women like. *shrug*

*putting away soapbox*

Model rash

Apparently, this is some sort of weird model rash. All the models in this one weirdo designer's lines had these on their foreheads. They don't look happy about it, either.

She looks seriously pissed to be looking like this.

This guy looks like he wishes he was anywhere else - getting a root canal, maybe - than being here in this ridiculous outfit with those weirdo dots on his head. I wonder if he is thinking this is worth the money.


Guest blogging

Of course, I spend more time blogging at Baboon Pirates the past few days and have been neglecting my own blog.

Come over and look at how we're redecorating while El Capitan is away on business.

Does this make my butt look big?

Uh, ok. Is it just me or does that look like she has saggy boobs with giant nipples swinging out to the sides, too?



I flip from football to Nascar and catch it just in time to see Tony Stewart get loose and my Kasey can't get around him.

*banging my head on the desk*

Kasey was smoked. *sigh*

Kasey just acknowledged he can't win the cup now. I know Tony Stewart didn't mean to do it, but it still sucks.

I love Sundays

In the name of Donovan McNabb, Brad Johnson and Carson Palmer. Amen.
The thrill of the NFL be with you.
And, also with you.

I'm worshipping at the altar of Sunday afternoon football. God is good.

Now, I'm struggling between three things to watch: the Nextel Cup Chase on TNT, my boys' Vikes versus Da Bears on Fox and my dear sweet Carson Palmer and Chad "Demolition Man" Johnson versus Big Ben and the Steelers. *sigh*

What a beautiful dilemma.

We are the goon squad

Fashion - Turn to the left
Fashion - Turn to the right
We are the goon squad
And we're coming to town
Beep-beep - Beep-beep
- David Bowie, Fashion

Fashion commentary from the formerly fashionable AoM, who now sadly wears suburban soccer mom anti-fashion.

I really like this green dress. It is very flattering and doesn't make her look like a twig, but I was going to make a comment about her not wearing a slip and how you can see through her dress. Then I saw this dress.

I guess it really isn't officially a dress, but a weird thing you'd wear on the beach of Miami to cover up the swimsuit to head into a beach bar or something.

I have more. I know you're all atwitter.

Get crazy with the cheese whiz

One positive thing about stress and anxiety - I've had a curbed appetite and I've hit my first weight loss goal. Now, I have 51 pounds to go. Ohmigod, that sounds like a lot, but I've already lost 13 since July 1. So, I feel good about it. I want the weight off by next summer, in time for my 20th high school class reunion. That is roughly six pounds a month, so I have a lot of work ahead of me. But, fortunately, my life is very stressful, so it should be easy. ;)


An anvil on my chest

Funny, I can clean house like there is no tomorrow when I have a heavy heart. Writing news stories, on the other hand, is like trudging through molasses.


SPF: Serenity Prayer style

Random and Odd's Stuff Portrait Friday assignment this week was brought on by Kristine's increasing anxiety and I can appreciate that feeling lately. Unfortunately, anxiety has been my constant companion this week.
1. Something you have outgrown…
2. Something you have overcome..
3. I need help with…

Ok, first one:

I have outgrown "baby lust." It is a uniquely female trait, I think, but we will see a baby and think "ooh, wouldn't it be great to have another baby?" I'm past that now.

2. I've overcome ...

My fear of guns. Now, I enjoy shooting. I'm a pretty good shot, too.

3. I need help with ...

My diet. I will have a good day, then stress or PMS or whatever comes along and I backslide.

So, did you play?



When this movie came out, I didn't have any interest in seeing it. But, once I watched it on TV, I fell in love with it. I still cry every time I see it. Such a tragic love story.

Some people

There are just some people who absolutely confound me. I'm a pretty nice person, but I acknowledge that I'm pretty much the kind of gal that you either really like me or you really dislike me. There isn't much in between. And, for the most part, I'm OK with that.

Don't get me wrong, I really like being liked. That is one reason why my dander gets up when people come to the blog and rag on me. I don't write things for criticism. That may come as a shock to some.

What started this little mini-rant is this one woman. She hates me with every ounce of her plus-size body, too. Not just a dislike, she hates me and she has no qualms to let me know how much she hates me. You know what, fine with me. Bad thing is, I'm catching myself acting as ugly as she is, in return. It all started when her little darling - we'll call Gabe - started playing soccer for us when he was in kindergarten. Not gifted with a fit frame, he was having a hard time running anyway, but then he made it worse by running with his tongue hanging out his mouth. (Yes, I know each of you is saying 'but that is dangerous because he'll bite his tongue off if he falls.) His mother took great offense to us telling him NOT to run like that. We even explained to her the dangers involved. Alas, she thought it was cute explaining how he inherited that trait from his grandmother (now, seeing the grandmother running with her tongue hanging out of her mouth gave me a visual that made me laugh and picture a basset hound, but that is neither here nor there). And, she did not want him corrected for it. She also complained that we yelled at the boys too much. I tried to explain that there are times when we have to yell to be heard and that the former soldier/former cop has an intimidating voice that isn't to be confused to a mean yell. All to no avail.

She complained about us to the commissioner and asked off the team at the end of the season. Whatever makes you happy. We were glad not to have the kid back on the team, to be honest.

While relating the story about this child to a neighbor - who was a kindergarten teacher at a private school - she said, oh that sounds like a student I have named Gabe. Swear to God. My eyes bugged out and I told her the child's last name and sure enough, it was the same kid. Apparently, his mother doesn't like him to be corrected in school either and complained about my neighbor - who is the dearest and fairest woman on the planet and kind to a fault - to the principal. It just seems the rest of the world hasn't discovered that mommy's little angel is perfect.

Well, lucky me, now he goes to my child's school. I learned - through the grapevine - that she told some nasty stories about us to another family, who subsequently asked for their two children to be removed from our soccer teams without even meeting us. So, I have to see bitchcakes every morning when she is dropping off her son and every afternoon when she is picking him up.

The last couple of times I saw her last spring on the soccer fields and spoke, she turned her head and acted like she didn't hear me and began talking to the other mom walking with me. So, I catch myself each morning walking the long way to my car to avoid eye contact with her, or I turn and engage the kids in conversation. All the while I'm thinking thoughts like, yeah, I might be chunky, but you're fat AND ugly or even worse thoughts. I don't like to be like that either. I'm a bit ashamed of myself for it and plan to take the high road this afternoon. If she is walking my direction, I'm going to try and engage the sow, er, woman in a conversation. I'll take the high road, even if she won't. Kill 'em with kindness my mother used to say. I think I'll feel better about myself if nothing else. If she chooses to act like a turd, at least I'll know I'm not to blame.


The Dark Side

I just like this.

Hump day beefcake

Josh Hartnett. This kid looks great in every movie I've ever seen him in.

He makes dog tags look almost as hot as they do on Army of Dad. I used to love him coming home sweaty from PT with his dog tags on ... ok, I need to stop before I go from PG to R.

Uh, yeah. Even serial killer eyes look good on him.

Yeah, what I said earlier about the dog tags. Add the wife beater. Mmm, mmm good.

Twofer with Harrison Ford. And, bonus for everyone who noticed that they are BOTH properly holding their weapons with their fingers indexed down the slide.


I needed that

After a LOOOOONG day, I finally had some ME time.

I got the kids in bed and grabbed the laptop and headed for Panera. Armed with free Wi-fi and a large IC Mocha, I managed to finish up the tittilating story about the tight office market in San Antonio.

I drove home with the windows rolled down and the Goo Goo Dolls cranking at the minivan's speaker capacity. I never get to do that with young'uns in the car. Unless we hear a song that is from Chicken Little or Curious George (which I love that song, by the way). But, it was great. Followed that up with My Sharona.

Life is good. I feel refreshed and ready to start my next day. Now, off for a sizzling hot bubble bath with some candles burning.

Arrrrr, get that booty

Today is Talk Like a Pirate Day and I keep getting warm fuzzies thinking about Alan Tudyk, my favorite pirate. Ok, El Capitan at Baboon Pirates runs a close second.

I have two other little pirates that I'm pretty fond of, too.

Pirate Stinkerbelle was taken in May with big brother's new Cap'n Jack Sparrow sword.

This was taken at Pirate Day at soccer camp July 2005. I didn't hunt down pics of my pirate pumpkin who guarded our front porch last Halloween, although I think he'll be back this year, too.


A big middle finger to terrorists

In a wonderful step in the right direction, the latest step in the rebuilding process of the World Trade Center site in Lower Manhattan occurred over the weekend, with the federal and New York State governments announcing plans to occupy a total of 1 million square feet in the Freedom Tower, the 1,776-foot-tall centerpiece of the redevelopment project.

The lease plans follow closely on the heels of two other major signs of progress at the site. On September 7, the final plans for three skyscrapers to be built on the site were unveiled by developer Larry Silverstein. The three towers--designed by world-renowned architects Norman Foster, Lord Richard Rogers and Fumihiko Maki--will add 6.2 million square feet to the site in addition to the 2.3 million-square-foot Freedom Tower.

Apparently, there are still concerns about the building's ability to get tenants, who may fear another terrorist attack. I can see that being a valid concern, but I like the gumption of those who give that big middle finger to terrorists and take the penthouse suite of the building. If it a company I can do business with, I most certainly will.

A tribute to Ranch Style Beans

ConAgra is closing the Ranch Style Beans factory in Fort Worth and I'm heartbroken.

Ranch Style Beans are probably one of my all-time favorite foods on the planet and knowing they were made in my hometown only made them tastier. Whenever we drove from my little hometown into "town" we always passed by the factory and the big sign.

I can still buy them at the store, but they just won't be home-grown anymore and that is sad. Something as a side note, when I was a little kid, they didn't say "appetite pleasin" on the can, it said "Husband pleasin." I thought it was funny and way too PC the first time I noticed the change years ago.

I may have to write a poem or something to show my love for this tasty treat.


So many of us take our blessings for granted: a loving spouse, the spontaneity of children and our own good health.

Please go by A Storm in Afghanistan and give up your Starbuck's money for the month or the McDonald's happy meals for a week or two. His wife is dying of cancer and the Army doesn't pay for hospice care at home. She wants to die at home with her children and not in a hospital.

Give and thank God for your blessings.

No rest for the wicked

So, that explains why I have no time to blog or post pictures, etc. We had soccer and baseball, my job interview, meetings at church, you name it, seems like we did it this weekend.

I've been accused of having no life by a commenter on the blog, which makes me laugh judging by how busy my life is. But, I really don't have time to post and may not for a few days. I have many deadlines that are looming.

My job interview went well *I think* and they said they should have a decision within two weeks. That would be nice. I've been talking to this publisher for about six months, so hopefully they're ready to make a move and I can be part of it. It would be nice to make some more money and still be able to work some from home (which was part of the discussions). The same commenter tried to be very funny and insult me and say that I'm a freelancer because I can't get a job. That was comical, too, since I write for several widely distributed magazines and have done projects for the world's fourth largest airport. You can't be a successful freelancer unless you're pretty darn good. *shrug* Just get irritated at people like that. They just want to get a rise out of others and it essentially reminds me of bullies who make fun of others to help them not feel so bad about their shortcomings. I guess I should feel sorry for them instead of being irritated.


Coming up roses

Ok folks, please send good vibes, happy thoughts and prayers in my direction. I am finally interviewing for my dream job Saturday afternoon.

Out of the blue, I got a call last spring from a magazine owner looking for a veteran journalist to help re-start a regional publication. We have talked back and forth over the past few months and she said the magazine was moving at a "glacial" pace on the hiring process.

Today, she called and said she was going to be Dallas tomorrow and has some time in between meetings and wanted to know if I could come for an interview.

This would be a great opportunity. I could still work from home part of the time and they would give me flexible hours and pay well.

I like the one on TV better

I had tossed the pair of shorts I wore this morning on the floor in the bathroom and was picking things up this afternoon when I caught an itty-bitty (like two inches long) little lizards in our bathroom. It was in my shorts. Not the ones I was wearing, but the ones I was picking up.


But, I caught it in a clear Coca-Cola cup the kids use to play with in the tub. I called Stinkerbelle in to look at him. We decided to take him to the back yard. I was going to let her hold it and as I was pouring it into her hands, the thing jumped the instant it touched her and scampered off. She was very disappointed.

Me, not so disappointed.

SPF: Boob Tube

Kristine's other half, Shaun, took over SPF assigning this week, so we have a TV-related SPF. Being a guy, I'm surprised there wasn't an assignment for our remote. I know my husband would rather lose an appendage than lose his remote control.

So, here are the assignments:
1. Your TV
2. Your Show - Sell us your TV show. This can be a show that you’ve been dying to see on TV but the networks haven’t been smart enough to think of.
3. The New Member of the Cast - When sitcoms start falling apart, like all of your lives, they just add a new character or replace an old one.

First off, I'm cheating. No pic of my TV. I just don't have the time or energy tonight to take fresh pics. So, I tried to find ones I've had that are applicable. Skipping to No. 2. *heh heh, in my best Beavis and Butthead voice - she said No. 2, heh heh heh*

My show: I was a childhood viking.

Setting: The suburbs
Main characters and story: Normal suburban family with a 4-bedroom mortgage. SAHM who doesn't wear pearls but prefers sweats and a ponytail; hardworking dad; moody artist pre-teen; adorable curly-headed preschool girl and the boy who is a Viking. Transported from the tundra of Minnesota complete with blond hair and blue eyes. The Viking boy has an alarm clock that sounds like a viking horn. He pillages and plunders. Obviously, clean family fun ensues. Rated mostly G.

New member of the cast:

When Viking boy accidently beheads his mother, hardworking dad knows the children need a new mother. Here, the women he is auditioning attempt to serenade him in effort of persuading him to choose them. He bows his head in a moment of silence as he contemplates which is most worthy and possibly the quickest on her feet to escape the pillaging and plundering.

So, did you play? Go to Random and Odd and see who played. Leave her a comment to let her know that you played, too.



I really hate it when sources make appointments with me and then don't call me when they say they will. They'll wait until later in the day when I'm either in the bathroom or eating. That is when they call back.


Another beloved Ann

While I was in college, one of the most beloved teachers at Baylor was English Professor Ann Miller.

I never had any of her classes, because they were always full before I could get in one. I have been negligent in staying on top of my alumni newsletter, but apparently Dr. Miller passed away Aug. 12.

What is funny is I remember having my first "you go, girl" moment in college when she was banging one of the guys in a big college band on campus. Now, it could have been a big rumor, but I don't think so, because I saw the "eyes" she gave him whenever the two of them were in proximity to one another.

Hey, equal rights for professors to have affairs with students and all. *rolling my eyes* I would think it would be awful hard to be human and around all these attractive college students and not want to have a fling now and then. As a college student, it is probably very flattering to have a professor shower you with that attention.

I don't think I ever had a teacher flirt with me, though. I just had Frau Martin, who thought I was a dear girl, and Herr Whateverhisnamewas and Senor Martinez. My language teachers just adored me and had to shake their head at why they liked me so much because I sucked ass in their classes. It was sort of funny. *shrug*

But, I digress. Ann Miller was considered one of the best teachers at Baylor and I admired her tenacity at boinking the hot guy. I hope she and Ann Richards can chase around the boys and pinch their butts in heaven.

She gave 'em hell

Former Texas Gov. Ann Richards died Wednesday after a battle with cancer.

She was the original blue-haired give-'em-hell Texas Democrat. She went dove hunting every year and she didn't bite her tongue. If she believed something, she said it. I admired her for that.

Before "growing up" and having kids, I was a staunch Texas Democrat and I was one of Ann's biggest supporters. In college, I worked on her gubernatorial campaign and wore my Ann Richards t-shirt everywhere during that election season. I interviewed her once when she was campaigning against then wanna-be Texas governor George W. Bush.

While my politics have changed through the years, my admiration for this old gal didn't.

May she rest in peace or conversely, give' em hell in heaven.


Out of the mouths of babes

My 7-year-old wanted a snack before we started running the day's errands and the evening chaos.

Hot Rod: Mom, I've got a little ding dong.
AoM: *initial silence then rip-roaring laughter*
Hot Rod: *blinking* Mom, why are you laughing so hard?

I don't guess kids today call it that anymore. That was just one euphemism from my childhood.

Hobbitt love resurfaces

It has been a while since I extended some love to the Hobbitts of the world.

That is until my gal pal, KR, shared some love.

Producers of a musical version of "The Lord of the Rings" are looking for candidates to play the hobbit heroes in the epic fantasy based on J.R.R.Tolkien's classic.

"The producers are looking for male and female actors and singers aged between 16-35 who must be under five feet seven inches. Hairy toes and feet are a distinct advantage," a spokesman said Tuesday.

Hmmm *scratching chin* I wonder if I could get to London next year to throw a pair of my knickers on stage.

You let me violate you

There is a darker side to me that I only show upon occasion. Ok, so everyone knows that I have the libido of a 19-year-old boy, but I'm much more sophisticated. Yeah, that's it.

But, occasionally, a good hair pull isn't a bad thing. I'm just guessing from Trent Reznor's lyrics, he'd do that for me every now and then. Nine Inch Nails tunes turn the stereo into a thumping aphrodisiac.

His voice just exudes sex. His looks are pretty hot, too.

He looks like he'd talk dirty during sex.

Yes, I know, he looks sort of goth and all.

But, you never know. He might like making the soccer mom beg for more. You know, the whole oedipus complex.

He's got some guns, too.

*biting my tongue* I won't even say what I'm thinking.

Is it just me or does this look some weird sort of hamster ball? Not that I wouldn't climb in with him and all.

Nice arms for a skinny guy.

Yes, I know, I went a bit overboard this week. What can I say? I downloaded all these pics over the weekend while I was lonely.


Bad omens

Well, the exercise regimen is going. I can't say it is going well because I still get REALLY pooped out and my stamina sucks. But, I'm walking for 20-30 minutes just about every day. When Hot Rod was sick and his dad was out of town, I didn't get to walk, but that was only a couple of days. So, I'm already back at it.

However, there are signs that I need to work harder.

1. About two weeks ago, I was pushing Little Bit in the stroller and toward the end of my 30 minutes, she turns around and looks up and asks "Mom, why are you going so slow now?"
2. While walking at our civic center's air conditioned track with all the old ladies - I was lapped by two 70-something-year-old women who were talking to each other the whole time they were walking. They weren't even out of breath.
3. (This was the coup de gras). Yesterday, while walking the loop around my neighborhood, a vulture was circling overhead.


Wow, I sound good

In a few weeks, I have to give a little presentation at a professional organization of which I'm on the board. They want me to talk about being a blogger and how blogs can impact the way people do business. I was forced to write a blurb about me. I hate doing that.

But, damn, I made myself sound good. ;)

Award-winning freelance journalist AoM spends many hours writing about the latest business developments in industries ranging from commercial property to garden centers. Tired of the curious looks she received from people when they asked her 'what kind of writing' she does, she finally decided to take up writing for herself and took on the moniker of Army of Mom. She began writing about everything from politics to celebrities to motherhood. No topic is sacred on her blog.

Since she started blogging in July 2004, she has garnered more than a quarter-million hits and finished in the top three for the 2004 Weblog Awards for Best of the Top 3500 - 5000 Blogs (a category above where she actually belonged) and won the 2005 Best of the Top 5001 - 6750 Blogs. About 1,000 people visit her blog at daily.

Wow. Now you people want my autograph, right? No? Well, how about sending money instead. I have a birthday in two months. I need $75 to pay my annual dues for this organization, too. Oy.

My baby is 12 today

I can't believe how grown up he is getting. He got new glasses on Saturday and he loves them.

He's 12 today. It was 12:47 a.m. on a Monday morning after 18 hours of labor and then going from 9 cm back to 8. The kid wasn't anxious to get here.

I just remember being mad that I was laboring during Sunday afternoon football. I remember Troy Aikman on the TV in the L&D room before I just faded. The Cowboys were playing the Redskins. Funny the little things I remember about that day.

I'm just blessed to have this little guy in my life.

Happy Birthday sweetheart.


Monday night football


The matchup to me is more about Army of Dad versus Chicken Legs. I think AoD wins that one. I hope the Vikings win, too. After all, the Redskins are a long time Cowboys rival.

Early start is good for the kids. I'm looking for my purple guy in the stands.

9/11 Refresher Course

Tremendous reminders of what happened five years ago today are posted at Cox and Forkum. They have a powerful photo as well as a list of links to posts of interest.

May we never forget

Today is a day of tears for me. A day of tears for many.

It has been five years ago that I was dressing my 2-year-old while watching the Today show and seeing the show break away to live coverage of a plane hitting the World Trade Center. I watched in disbelief. Things only got worse from there.

I remember the horror and fear that gripped me that morning. I was scared of what was going to happen next. I looked over my shoulder wherever I went.

Then, those tears of sorrow and fear turned to tears of anger. Our lives would forever be changed by the course of events on Sept. 11, 2001. My children will forever look over their shoulders and that is unfortunate.

My two youngest children asked me why I was putting the flag out bright and early this morning and I reminded Hot Rod that today is the fifth anniversary of the day the bad people took over the planes and flew them into buildings and we want to never forget the people who died and how our country was under attack, but we prevailed.

Today is Patriot Day. Pickle, who turns 12 tomorrow and was in the first grade when the attacks occurred, asked me what a patriot is this morning as he was looking at the calendar.

I turned to dear old Webster's Dictionary and told him: a patriot is someone who loves his or her country and supports its authority and interests.

It is a perfect name for the day.

Here are a variety of stories that are good reads for the occasion:

This one highlights the everyday people who were thrust into the spotlight on 9/11. A young woman who was adopted discovered that her father was one of the heroes on Flight 93. And a reminder that we are still not safe from terrorism.

It is an image I'd like to forget, but one of which we need to be reminded.

My heart goes out to all those impacted by 9/11 from my son who had to go through play therapy to ease his fear of a plane crashing into our house to the pregnant widow who wore her husband's "I survived the WTC bombing" shirt for days while she searched for him after the attacks. I will never forget her face and the heartbreak she must have experienced.

Tribute to our fighting forces

Toby Keith said it well in his song, American Soldier.

Here's to you, Rob. Stay safe in Tikrit.

I'm just trying to be a father
Raise a daughter and a son
Be a lover to their mother
Everything to everyone
Up and at 'em, bright and earlyI
'm all business in my suit
Yeah, I'm dressed up for success
From my head down to my boots

I don't do it for the money
There's bills that I can't pay
I don't do it for the glory
I just do it anyway
Providing for out future's my responsibility
Yeah, I'm real good under pressure
Being all that I can be

And I can't call in sick on Mondays
When the weekends been too strong
I just work straight through the holidays
And sometimes all night long.
You can bet that I stand ready when the wolf growls at the door
Hey, I'm solid, hey I'm ready, hey I'm true down to the core
And I will always do my duty, no matter what the price
I've counted up the cost, I know the sacrifice
Oh, and I don't want to die for you
But, if dyins asked of me
I'll bear that cross with honor
Cause freedon don't come free

I'm an American soldier, an American
Beside my brothers and my sisters I will proudly take a stand
When Liberty's in jeopardy, I will always do what's right
I'm out here on the front line
Sleep in peace tonight.
American soldier, I'm an American soldier.

Yeah, an American solider, an American
Beside my brothesr and my sisters, I will proudly take a stand
I'm out here on the front line
So sleep in peace tonight.
American soldier, I'm an American soldier.
Yeah, an American solider, an American soldier.
God bless our fighting forces and their families, who sacrifice their time with them.


Green-eyed monster

I texted my honey the score of the Twins game because I know he is out site-seeing in Washington, D.C., today.

He texts me back .... this is where he is at right now:


I'm green with envy. I have only been to DC once in my life, when I was 13 and the White House was closed the few days we were there because of visiting dignitaries.