Army of Mom

So this is how liberty dies ... with thunderous applause.


Everybody's doing it

I don't know why, but this is called The Death Meme. LabKat did it, Three Bed Two Bath, and a few others I surfed across. So, here it goes.

Three names you go by:
Army of Mom

Three screen names you have:
Army of Mom

Three things you like about yourself:
I'm a good mom
I'm a hard-worker
I have big boobs

Three things you hate/dislike about yourself:
I'm overweight
I have a mole on my face that I detest
I am hot tempered

Three parts of your heritage:
Who knows? Heinz 57, I think:
American Indian

Three things that scare you:
Something hurting my children
Disappointing Army of Dad
Not being able to pay the bills

Three of your everyday essentials:
My computer
My minivan

Three things you are wearing right now:
My cast and walking boot
Warm-up pants

Three of your favorite bands/artists (at the moment):
Harry Connick Jr.
Kenny Chesney

Three of your favorite songs at present:
Live Like You Were Dying by Tim McGraw
There Goes My Life by Kenny Chesney
Make Me Bad by Korn

Three things you want to try in the next 12 months:
Working out regularly
Regaining the strength in my right wrist and right foot
To be able to afford my housekeeper again

Three things you want in a relationship (love is a given):
To be treated with respect
To be honored and cherished
Sex and lots of it

Two truths and a lie:
I dated a minor league baseball player
I was voted Most Likely to Succeed in my graduating class
I changed my major from journalism to education because I didn't like how newsprint felt

Three physical things about the opposite sex that appeals to you:
Strong shoulders
Nice biceps
Pretty eyes

Three things you just can't do:
Give up Dr Pepper
Give up cursing
Getting in those tubes at Chuck E. Cheese

Three of your favorite hobbies:
Surfing the Internet

Three things you want to do really badly right now:
Get my foot out of this cast
Get out of debt
Have sex - it has been a week

Three careers you're considering:
No idea on a third

Three places you want to go on vacation:
Las Vegas
Australia/New Zealand

Three kids' names:

Three things you want to do before you die:
See my children grow up healthy and happy
Write a best-selling book
Rock climb

SVU marathon

I am in hog-heaven today. There is a Law and Order: SVU marathon on USA Network today and then You've Got Mail tonight on TNT. This may be a happy New Year after all. I can ring in the New Year with Lord of the Rings. USA Network is hosting a Monk marathon on New Year's Day.

TNT is hosting a Law and Order marathon Sunday featuring Jerry Orbach episodes. Damn right during football.

Flashing my assets to the world

I was reading Dear Abby this morning and comments about the distaste of hospital gowns caught my eye. Since I just had surgery last week, this is a fresh topic for me. When I had surgery in October on my wrist, the nurse told me that I could have left my panties on if they were cotton. Well, they were satiny Victoria's Secrets that day, so I wore my cotton VS panties last week in hopes of keeping my drawers on. When the nurse brought me the hospital gown and asked me to disrobe, I asked about leaving my panties on and she told me to take them off (and she actually told me why, which was nice). She said if something happened in surgery and it took longer than anticipated, this way they could insert a catheter in and out so I wouldn't pee on myself. This explanation makes perfect sense. And, thankfully, no one felt me up this time.


Xbox live is from the devil

Not only does this shit cost almost as much as a car payment, but it reminds me of the days when I dated a dorky gamer who used to role-play at his kitchen table with other dorky soldiers. Thank God these guys look good in BDUs.

I can hear Army of Dad and some dork arguing about who played better or worse in some Halo 2 game. I can hear the asshole on the other line yelling into AoD's headset. And they're on the opposite side of the house from me. AoD amazes me at how he maintains his composure when he deals with other people. I guess I have some great effect on him that makes his eyes bug out when we argue. Ah, now THAT is passion and love, I tell you.

White flag has been raised

A truce has been called. I will take my calloused shell of a soul and zip my lips when it comes to my lack of feelings for the 100,000+ victims of the tsunami in Indonesia.

I have been informed that I'm heartless and I've taken the following oath *with my right hand raised and everything.*

I do hereby swear that I will cease and desist in being a hate-filled woman in this instance.

Are you happy now LabKat? Friends again? I think Doug at Bogus Gold has the right idea. I will thank God tonight that my family is safe and say a little prayer for those suffering because of the disaster.

Talk about a tragedy

Growing up and living with the name Danny Cockburn. I went to the grocery store and saw a work van for Danny Cockburn Electric. Gees. I bet that was awful growing up. I interviewed a guy for a story the other day named Woody Dick and wondered how much his parents must have hated him when he was born. But, think about the origins of these names. In the old days, many names were derived from a person's profession: Johnny Shoemaker, Johnny Miller, you get the idea. How did these poor souls come up with dick and cockburn for family names? I also worked with a guy named Dick Hardin. I swear to God, I'm not making it up.

Exhibit A

This is why my liberal friends think I'm an asshole for not pouring out my funds to help the tsunami victims. While I think this is a tragic occurrence, I don't see any reason to reach into my shallow pockets and lay out any money for their relief.

Hat tip to Bane for referring me to one of Army of Dad's favorite blogs, Kim DuToit for providing me with exhibit A. Look at the t-shirt of the guy standing behind the victim being carted off.

Where a kid can be a kid

Took the kids to Chuck E. Cheese for lunch and it was pretty fun. We go REALLY cheap, so it isn't so offensive. We get coupons on Koolaid bottles at the store, so we get a large pizza for $9.99 and we have free tokens coupons. I have some refillable cups we got as party favors, so we get our drinks for free. Can't beat that for a few hours of fun. Army of Dad likes to play the games and Little Bit LOVES to dance to the music. All in all, not too bad.

My pizza-eating Vikings.

Chuck E. Cheese car driving Little Bit with Hot Rod sneaking in.

The would-be Vikings firefighters. Lots of jokes could be made with phallic references, but I choose not to go that route - this time! Sort of looks like he has a pencil over his right ear, too, but that is something on the wall.

Little Bit likes the toddler playground. It is just her size.

Now back to work while Army of Dad and Hot Rod run some errands. I put Little Bit down for a nap, but she is fighting it big time!

Is this cute or what?

Arizona Game and Fish Department released this photo of a black-footed ferret as it emerged from a burrow at a pen near Seligman, Ariz. Endangered black-footed ferrets are reproducing and surviving longer in the wild than they have since recovery efforts began nearly a decade ago, according to wildlife biologists. Biologists have found 28 ferrets in the last two years in Arizona that were born in the wild - more than double the number found during any two-year period since a reintroduction program began in 1996.

Not much to blog about right now, can you tell? Army of Dad got home safely last night at 11 p.m. and even brought me some flowers, which was a nice surprise. I have a phone interview for a story in a few minutes, then we'll probably take the kids to Chuck E. Cheese for lunch. Hot Rod wanted some time with dad to play, but wanted the "whole family" to go. He was sad that Boo is still with his dad in Waco at his grandmother's there. But, he'll make do with the rest of us. I have some more writing to do today and then I'll likely continue putting up Christmas decorations, albeit slowly. The cast makes it take a little more time because I get fatigued a little easier than I normally would. But, that is ok. I learned this morning that one of my dear friends is pregnant. I'm so excited for her. I love babies!


What pinup are you?

Went to check out LabKat and found out that she is Bettie Page. I thought I would be Bettie Page, too, but I'm Betty Grable. I'll take that. I don't have great legs, though, unless you like tree stumps, but I did inspire a few G.I.s while I lived near Fort Hood.

You are Betty Grable!
You're Betty Grable!

What Classic Pin-Up Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

Little Bit's first haircut

Well, she is 26 months old and we finally had to trim up that crazy hair. She did pretty well. We went to my regular hairdresser and he spent just a couple of minutes making just a few clips so the front of her hair won't be so wild. I think he did a pretty good job. My mom - who ALWAYS takes crooked pictures - was manning the camera.

Keith grabbed an envelope for me to save some of those pretty little curls he cut off.

She fussed, but she sat still and she was happy when we were done.

Lumiere died

There are few celebrities that make me cry when they die, but this one did. Jerry Orbach died Tuesday of prostate cancer. I have loved watching him perform for as long as I can remember.

I loved him as Lumiere in Beauty and the Beast and Law and Order is one of my ALLTIME favorite TV shows. As of about 9 a.m. central time today, if you went to this Law and Order link, they still had this little animation of Orbach walking out and challenging you to watch the show and "try to do my job."

Detective Lennie Briscoe has been part of my life for years. He will be missed.

What did I tell you?

76,000 people are now feared dead in that tsunami. And, what did I say? Americans would lead the way in relief efforts.

From the AP story:
"We will stand with them as they start to rebuild their communities," President Bush said from his Texas ranch in his first comments on the disaster Sunday that so far has killed more than 76,000.
Bush pledged a multifaceted response from the United States that goes far beyond the $35 million initially pledged, including U.S. military manpower and damage surveillance teams in the short term and long-term rebuilding assistance. He also called on Americans to donate cash to relief organizations to augment the response.

I am proud to live in a great country that embraces those less fortunate wherever they are in the world.

A memorable moment

Little Bit is going to get her first haircut today. We won't do much but just trim her bangs so she doesn't have the Simply Red look so much.

Of course I started my period and Army of Dad is coming home tonight from his business trip. Great timing. I'm bloated and icky. Lovely.

I usually save back a few toys for my children after Christmas so they have another nice treat, so my two little ones got some Little Tykes vehicles. Hot Rod got a monster truck and Little Bit got a tractor. In typical 2-year-old fashion, she is trying to ride it (despite it only being about six inches long!). It looked a little obscene. Then, Hot Rod was playing with a darts-style game that uses tennis balls with velcro on the target. He kept telling me to "look at my balls!" It sounds kind of bad in my house today!

Thank God, Little Bit's little pink mouse beanie baby thingee is driving her tractor now. Somehow that looks better and less obscene.


The day from hell

This has been one of those days. I went and got my cast on my foot this morning. I have a lovely royal blue cast on my foot and lower leg. It goes to right under my knee. I just found out this morning at the doctor, though, that when I return in two weeks to get the cast off and the stitches out that I'll have a boot thing on for another two to three weeks after that. Just stinks. I saw the boo-boo, for lack of a better word. Looked awful to me. I have three separate incisions and the swelling was all distorted looking. *shrug* The doctor seemed to think it looked like it was healing fine. Blech.

I'm cramping and all PMSy. I hate it. I was weeping for a dozen different reasons earlier. Just frustration. The job I interviewed for has a few other people to interview, so I'm not sure if I'll get the job or not. I was really thinking I had it by the way the interview was - "You'll be doing this. You'll be working with ..." You know the drill.

Got a call from one of my editors. Of the five stories I have due in the next week or two, I found out that one is due tomorrow!!! I thought it was due on Monday. So, I had to get on a horse and get it done today. Got the interviews done and will write it tonight.

Today is my mom's 65th birthday, too. I feel sort of bad that she is staying at my house and helping babysit me and the kids on her birthday. I did make her a german chocolate cake, though. She had to take it out of the oven for me while I was doing a phone interview for my story. I hated to ask her to do it, but didn't want it to burn either.

Surfing the net in between phone interviews and I'm such a Harry Potter dork. I found these websites for Seamus Finnegan and Crabbe. Turns out that a sci-fi con in Orlando is advertising Seamus and the Weasley twins are going to be there and they never agreed to go, but this con is still advertising that they'll be there. I hate that. The con still has a lot of cool people going to be there from Chekov and Counselor Troi to Darth Maul. But, that is wrong to advertise HP folks when they never agreed to go. *shrug* Not that I could go to Orlando to do it, but still.

Off to limp into the kitchen and make some sandwiches for supper. It is nice not to have the crutches anymore, but I'm walking like a dork now. *shrug*

Dreams and casts

I had weird dreams last night about going up elevators in high-rise buildings and walking across busy intersections - all of this with my kids. Can you tell the things that I'm scared of? I hate tall buildings and I'm paranoid about walking across the street with my kids. I think I'm thinking about the job I may be taking and I'm worried about the impact on the kids being in daycare and away from me. I know they'll be fine, but I worry.

Going to get my walking cast this morning. A couple of super blood-stained bandages worked their way up to my toes of my splint and grossed me out. I hope I can clean my foot pretty good before we put the cast on. I hate taking a bath like this, too.

Oh well. At least my foot will stop hurting every day when all is said and done. Plus, I can start driving today, too. Woo hoo! Even my kids have been asking to go run errands because they're tired of being cooped up in the house. Army of Dad returns late Wednesday night. The baby told me "Daddy leave" yesterday. So, she knew he was gone. Bless her little heart.


I hate people

Ever see the Christmas show Scrooge starring Sir Albert Finney? It has a number in there called "I hate people" and I often sing that song at moments like this.

I really feel that way right now. I have five story assignments to work on this week. Two of the five, I've had for several weeks and have been trying REPEATEDLY to contact these people and getting assistants and voicemails. Finally found out TODAY after numerous calls and messages that BOTH subjects are out of the country till next week or later. WHY COULDN'T SOMEONE HAVE TOLD ME THAT TWO WEEKS AGO so I would have known they were unavailable before my deadline and we could have found someone else to be the subjects of these stories? Gees. Now, we will be scrambling to find people the magazine wants to profile that I can interview and write about before THURSDAY!!!!

I really hate people.

I may be struck by lightning

It is completely insensitive of me, but just a thought: most of these people are muslim, aren't they? Any coincidence that this happened around Christmas? I'm just saying, maybe God was sending them a message. Of course, you don't see Americans dancing in the streets and handing out candy to children because more than 22,000 muslims were killed in one occurrence. No, you see Americans extending their sympathies. You see Americans loading up supplies to send there. You see Americans volunteering to go help. No, you don't see us rejoicing because of their deaths. When I first heard the news Sunday morning, I felt so sad for these people and thought "how awful" for such a thing to happen to anyone anywhere.

I just wonder if they'd feel the same way if it happened here? I doubt it.

On a lighter note: The penguins escaped a similar fate two days earlier. I wonder if the two earthquakes were related somehow?

Monday morning blahs

Feeling pretty sad and pathetic this morning. Army of Dad left before the sun came up - not all that unusual - but this time he was heading for the airport and a business trip to Atlanta. Worst part was that we didn't get along just great on Sunday. Mr. Type A, his other alias, gets a bit worked up before undertaking a task (in this case, preparing to go work in Atlanta) and he gets pissy. Well, he likes to snap at people when he's pissy, so everything I said yesterday hit him wrong. Even though I know that he is stressed about leaving, it still causes me to snap back and we wind up in an argument. Just sucks. He went shooting with some friends yesterday to test-fire the new gun he got for the boys. So, I was on my own with the two youngest for much of the day. I'm starting to PMS, which doesn't help.

This morning I awoke about 7:30 to the sounds of the garbagemen picking up the trash. AoD took it out before he left, so that was good. I don't think I could manage to get it down to the curb while limping pathetically on the crutches. Plus, our house is at the top of an incline, so I don't think I'm skilled enough to get up and down it. Plus, we had LOTS of trash after Christmas. Probably three times as much trash as we normally have. Our recycling bin is already filled to the top, too.

This is really pathetic. I have found that it is easier to crawl up the stairs than to even attempt to climb them with the crutches. Once upstairs, I just crawl around on all fours like a baby. So, I went up to get the baby. She told me she wanted a fresh diaper and then said "Daddy leave." He made a point of kissing each of them goodbye this morning and she evidently remembered it. It was sweet, but a little melancholy. I crawled to Hot Rod's room and got him some clothes. Each child needed a bath as they hadn't had one in a couple of days. So, we came back downstairs and as I was bathing them, the phone rings. I can't leave them in the tub and even if I could, I couldn't hobble fast enough on my crutches to make it to the phone. I knew it was AoD calling and immediately I got this sick feeling in the pit of my stomach remembering all those voicemails from the passengers on the flights on 9-11 calling loved ones and leaving messages for them. I kept trying to call him back. I knew - logically - that he was simply calling because he was through security and had a minute to talk, but I worried. What if something was wrong on the plane and he was calling me. I kept dialing his phone and getting his voicemail. I finally relaxed and called my voicemail and there was his reassuring voice telling me that he had a minute before he got on the plane and wanted to let me know that all was well and he was departing. *whew*

I talked a bit to Hot Rod about the prospects of me returning to work. He asked if dad was going to stay home to take care of him and I said no, that he'd go to daycare after school. I tried to explain what daycare is a bit to him. He seemed to be taking it all in. A few minutes later, he asked me why I had to go back to work. I don't think he likes this idea too well. I don't think I do either, but I keep trying to tell myself that I'll have adult time without kids under my feet all the time. I'll have money to pay the bills without having to rob Peter to pay Paul. It is only temporary, right? Right. It won't be forever. Just feels like it will be right now.


Fishing is very sexual

I usually make fun of Army of Dad for watching fishing and hunting shows on the weekend mornings. But, if you are just listening and not watching, it can be quite the turn on. It sounds a bit like I imagine gay porn would sound.

First off, the hunters are always using low, whispery, breathy voices.
*have to say this in a hushed whisper*
Wow. Look at that one! Must be at least 10 inches!
At least, Earl.
Wow. I can wait to take that one down.
Let's see if you can do it one shot.
He went down hard!
Wow. He's a beauty!

Then, before I realized it, he turned to a fishing show.This guy sounded like he was going to shoot a load while he was fishing. He was out of breath, moaning and exclaiming something like Oh yeah, Oh yeah ... I figured he was telling himself silently not to shoot a load right there in the fishing boat.

I'm telling you ... it is quite the turn on. Ok, maybe not. But, if you just take the audio and dub it over a porn video or something - I'm telling you, it would work.

I dare you ... next Saturday or Sunday morning ... turn on a hunting or fishing show and then listen and don't watch ... you'll be laughing hysterically.


Sense of accomplishment

I just constructed the Hot Wheels' Raptor Blast race track with only two engineering improvements from Army of Dad. Wowsers! That has to be a first for me.

Stinkerbelle loves it!

Merry Christmas!

We had a great Christmas. Very tasty ham and all the traditional sides for our family - sweet potato casserole (recipe from a friend of mine), yankee stuffing, cornbread stuffing, green bean casserole, scalloped corn, crescent rolls ... then a pecan pie made by LabKat (very tasty) and a chocolate pie from Red, Hot and Blue. Yummy!

We started opening gifts about 7 a.m. *yawn* The kids had a great time. Santa separates each child's gifts into a pile and they know what is theirs by their stockings. Each kiddo got a new backpack and the each of the boys got Xbox games. They had about five to 10 gifts each from Santa, so they were pretty good. I didn't buy a bunch of stuff for each of them like I have tended to do in the past. I just got each of them what they asked for, which wasn't much. They got lots of other stuff from friends and family, too. All in all- a great holiday for them. Stinkerbelle got lots of Blue's Clues stuff. Hot Rod got lots of GI Joe and army guys and Boo got lots of Sonic the Hedgehog and Yugioh. I got the Lord of the Rings extended version DVD trilogy that I asked for as well as a couple of CDs, The Sir Gawain book I wanted, some cologne that I needed and a toaster oven, among a few other things. Army of Dad got some new binoculars, a knife and a big pot to make spaghetti sauce. He got the boys a little 22 rifle, too. So, they'll be going to the range some and learning how to shoot. Should be good for them.

My parents were here for Christmas Eve and this morning. LabKat and JS had dinner with us. She gave me a tremendously generous giftcard to Barnes and Noble. I feel sort of bad. I gave her a little killer whale and ladybug blown glass thingees and a framed picture of her and Chewbacca (Peter Mayhew). It was nice to have them here. We enjoy having people over for the holidays.

Hot Rod shows off his Army Ranger.

Little Bit with one of her many Blue's Clues toys.

Boo is surrounded by toys.

Granny and Papa help Little Bit get her Barbie mobile vet minivan out of the box. Funny that Barbie isn't the vet. It is being manned by a University of Florida cheerleader barbie doll.

We thought this one almost looks like an NRA ad.


Merry Christmas Eve

After Santa (aka Uzz) came for a brief visit tonight, Pickle checked out Santa's status on Norad. Pickle knows it was his dad, but the little kids were awed and amazed. We have little gifts for Santa to give.
Stinkerbelle was ok with the big guy as long as he was giving her presents.

Pickle and his dad, er, Santa.

Hot Rod looks so excited.

All the kids with Santa.

And, my friend, Rufus, even got something - a deck of cards and cup of candy.

Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night!

Merry Christmas from a Ho Ho Ho!

Well, I'm feeling much better right now. I took some Vicodin while eating and it made quite the difference. Thanks to all of my friends who know enough about drugs to educate me on that. Of course EVERY muscle in my body is sore from using crutches and relying on other parts of my body to do the work my right leg and foot normally do alone. No wonder I had bone spurs. Gees Louise.

I'm taking it very slow and doing little bits of preparation and then relaxing and doing a little more. Army of Dad and Hot Rod are making a few deliveries and last-minute pick-ups for me this morning. So, I have the house to myself for a little while. Listening to my Harry Connick Jr. Christmas CD - When My Heart Finds Christmas - while I do some preparations for the Christmas day meal. Very nice. I have on my Santa necklace and Santa apron. I need to make some cookie dough, so we can make some fresh cookies for Santa tonight.

I'm going to eat some of Army of Dad's homemade spaghetti sauce for lunch and then we plan to watch the Vikings today at 2:30 p.m. Go Vikes! After that, everyone should start arriving for the evening. We usually watch A Christmas Story and eat sandwiches. We open one gift each. I got to open mine already - Army of Dad got me a nice new Pyrex pie dish. He figured I should have it before I do the pumpkin pie. How considerate. *hee hee* But, after that, I usually gather the children on the stairs and read to them about the true Christmas story. Then, they're off the bed and Santa comes to visit.

You can track Santa's progress tonight using NORAD. My kids love this and we do it each year.

In the words of Harry Connick Jr: Happy Ho Ho Ho to you!


Being helpless sucks

I really REALLY HATE being dependent on other people to do things for me.

Not only do I have to rely on Army of Dad or Hot Rod or whoever to help me do things, I get yelled at when I try to do things myself. It totally sucks. I couldn't even take a normal bath tonight. I'm trying to lounge in my garden tub with my right leg dangling over the edge. It didn't work too well. Wasn't much relaxing possible. I'm not sure what I'll do when I have to wash my hair. I guess I'll have to rely on AoD again. I hate that. He hates that, too. Or, at least, that is the feeling I get.


I'm really not one to depend on others. I never have been. It is one of those traits that often tests my faith because it is hard for me to rely on God and not try to solve all my problems or challenges alone. I have to take deep breaths and hand things over to Him. It is REALLY REALLY HARD for me to do. I am woman, hear me roar. My parents raised me in such a way that I would never have to depend on anyone to take care of me. They wanted me to be self-reliant. Well, for the most part, it worked. Of course, I am not mechanical, so that area is lacking for me, but that is why God gave me big boobs. I can get men to do these things for me. But, I digress. It causes a lot of hardship for me, emotionally, because I don't want to depend on anyone for anything. I have found, in the past, that if I have to rely on others, I'm often disappointed. It is one thing that is both good and bad about me and Army of Dad. We both have high expectations of ourselves and others. The difference is that I don't strive for perfection any more and I don't expect it out of others. Army of Dad - he still does. I keep hoping he'll grow out of it one day.

On a lighter note, we tried to watch Elf tonight. I don't think we lasted 30 minutes into the DVD before I had to shut it off. Uzz and my eldest both told me great things about it, but I just couldn't keep going. Sorry guys. It is a thumbs down and I regret wasting 30 minutes on it.

A Jew says 'Merry Christmas'

This guy has it right.

I hate all the PC stuff. A story in the Fort Worth Star-Telegram chronicles one how the Parker County Commissioners have waffled back and forth about decorating the courthouse lawn for the holidays. Earlier this month, they prohibited any displays on the lawn, but Mark Davis from WBAP Talk Radio bitched about it on the air and enough listeners and Parker County residents called and raised hell and the court reconsidered.

According to the FWST story:
"This will include secular items such as a Christmas tree, reindeer, lights and other elements that are considered historical, traditional and secular as developed by a group of volunteers," said Parker County Judge Mark Riley. "I do want to add that it is the court's intent to comply with the Supreme Court's decisions."
The display can include a Nativity scene, Riley said. Precinct 3 Commissioner Charles Akin said the display is not a Christian/atheist issue but will depict the holiday.
Local attorney Earl King said he is delighted. "I think the commissioners created a very good procedure for permitting the citizens of Parker County to acknowledge the celebration of the Christmas season in a traditional way," he said.

Geesus. They aren't trying to "witness" to anyone and save any souls. They just want to celebrate Christmas. Some atheists got their panties in a wad about this. I really don't get it. I don't care if the courthouse has a big mennorah on it or even a festive basket or menorrah-looking candle in recognition of the made-up Kwanzaa holiday. I'm too drug-induced to really debate this properly. How about I just say that these atheists who are intolerant of the world suck. I tolerate people of all faiths and typically respect them for their beliefs. I just don't get people who don't.

What a day

Woke up about 3:30 a.m. and watched A Christmas Story and finished a baby blanket for my expectant sister-in-law. Army of Dad will get to see her next week and he wanted to take the pretty little pink blanket (very princess like with tiaras and ballet slippers on it) to give to her while he was there. I think she'll like it. I went back to bed about 5ish and woke up around 7:30 or so. I feel much better today. Right now the Vicodin has made me nauseous, but as soon as it is out of my system, I'll be taking less of it or just switching straight to tylenol or something.

Army of Dad took me and Hot Rod to breakfast this morning at LePeep and then we bought me some athletic pants so I have something comfy AND that fits over the splint and the leg cast for the following two weeks. I found two pairs on sale. Woo hoo! Got some cash at the bank and had a huge fight for a good 30 minutes. We were sort of due because we've been getting along entirely too well. Plus, AoD doesn't want to admit it, but we have wound up in a huge fight following each medical procedure I've had done this year. I think he gets worried about me, bottles it all up and then when I'm fine, the first thing I do that pisses him off lets the demons out and the fighting begins. *shrug*

The boys (AoD and Hot Rod) came home and played in the snow.

They had a good time, but it was SOOOO cold. I snapped a few shots from the garage and then came back in the house. AoD built me a fire and they're about to leave to run some errands and pick up our holiday ham from Red, Hot and Blue. Should be tasty.

I have been meaning to call my OB/GYN to check on my pap smear results and they called this morning. I still don't understand. The pap smear came back atypical, again, but the pre-cancerous cells were negative and the doctor said it was fine and we'll repeat the pap at my annual exam in July. I quizzed the nurse over and over about why we shouldn't be worried if the pap was atypical and she said it could be something as simple as my cycle being at a weird time and registering that result. Whatever. I guess if the doctor thinks it is fine, I'll trust him. *shrug*


Graceful I'm not

I've never been graceful when it comes to anything, but me on crutches is simply laughable.

Surgery went well. My foot hurts like hell. I'm taking the maximum dose of hydrocodone allowable and my foot still hurts. That sucks.

I'm sick to my stomach. Blech.

Got to the hospital at 11 this morning and they took me back into the little room things around noonish. I didn't have surgery until 3 because the doctor's previous surgery required more time. I'm about to go to bed. Just too tired to function.

Go see my cute boy playing in the snow at Uzzman.

Sweet kids, snow and surgery - Oh my!

My kids are so sweet sometimes. Not all the time, but sometimes. This was at the Fort Worth Museum of Science and History.

She loves her brother.

It is snowing BIG TIME today. The kids are so excited. Hot Rod went to daycamp and Pickle went with his dad on some shoots and then he'll get to come home and play in the snow. Stinkerbelle is about 60 miles south of us and they haven't gotten any snow yet, but the temps are continuing to go down and we may get up to three inches of snow. This is a big deal in Texas. Of course, I won't be able to enjoy it because I'll have a splint on my foot, but Army of Dad is like a little kid when it snows, so the children will have a blast.

Here is a view from our front porch.

It doesn't adequately show the giant snowflakes that are coming down. I'm so happy to get some snow. Hot Rod said "This is what Christmas is all about!" to which his brother said, "NO it isn't! It is about Baby Jesus being born!" Of course, this wonderful exclamation of Christianity was said in that pissy 'you moron' voice. Ahh, the spirit of Christmas. *shaking my head*

I leave in about 15 minutes for the hospital. Surgery is scheduled for noon, but the doctor said I'm the third surgery of the day, so he may be running behind. How come I'm never as hungry as when I know that I can't eat? Sucks big time.


My brain is numb

Do you ever feel this way? It just feels like my mind is numb. I sort of want to cry, but I don't.

Pickle had a good check up at the doctor this morning after our 90-minute wait to see her. We had tickets to see an Imax movie at 11 and she came in at 10:40. Now, the museum is about five to 10 minutes away, so I asked her if she'd go quickly so we could make it. She did while addressing all of our concerns and questions. She pronounced him well, told him to stay active and said we didn't have to come back for six months. Next time, we'll do x-rays for a bone age and the blood levels. His birth defect, if the meds aren't monitored correctly, will cause his bones to age faster than normally. So, we check that about once a year. He is doing really well these days.

We were a few minutes late to the Imax, but they let us in the back door so we could watch Santa vs. The Snowman again. Little Bit can now say snowman. Very cute. We ate Mickey D's and went to my mom's. I took a brief nap - going to sleep at 3:15 a.m. and waking at 6:45 a.m. isn't good for me. I'm too old for this shit. I went to my job interview and I think I'll be taking the job. My first time back in the workforce after five years of working from home. I'm anxious and scared about the prospect. I also want to scream because I don't want to leave my baby in daycare. I love being home with her and being here for my boys after school and during school. This will be the longest six to nine months of my life, but I can't pass up this money. It will be the most I've ever been paid and it will allow us to get the car paid off about six months sooner and get ahead on some bills.

I can't eat after midnight and I have to be at the hospital at 11 a.m. Surgery is scheduled for noon, but my doctor said not to expect it that soon. I was hoping to watch Elf tonight, but that won't happen at this point. I'm too tired to stay up. I'm going to go take my last bath sans cast on right foot for a few weeks.

A Mom's Night Before Christmas

'Twas The Night Before Christmas....Mom Style, by anonymous author

Twas the night before Christmas,
When all thru the abode,
Only one creature was stirring,
And she was cleaning the commode.

The children were finally sleeping,
All snug in their beds,
While visions of N-64 & Barbie
Flipped through their heads.

The dad was snoring
In front of the TV,
With a half-constructed bicycle
Propped on his knee.

So only the mom
Heard the reindeer hooves clatter,
Which made her sigh,
"Now what is the matter?"

With toilet bowl brush
Still clutched in her hand,
She descended the stairs,
And saw the old man.

He was covered with ashes
Which fell with a shrug;
"Oh great," muttered the mom,
"Now I have to clean the rug."

"Ho Ho Ho!" cried Santa,
"I'm glad you're awake."
"Your gift was especially
Difficult to make."

"Thanks, Santa, but all I want
Is time alone."
"Exactly!" he chuckled.
"So, I've made you a clone."

"A clone?" she muttered.
"What good is that?"
"Run along, Santa;
I've no time for chit chat."

Then out walked the clone -
The mother's twin;
Same hair, same eyes,
Same double chin.

"Fantastic!" the mom cheered.
"My dream has come true!"
"I'll shop, I'll read,
"I'll sleep a night through!"

From the room above,
The youngest did fret.
"Mommy! Come quickly,
''I'm scared & I'm wet."

The clone replied,
"I'm coming, sweetheart."
"Hey," the mom smiled.
"She sure knows her part."

The clone changed the small one
And hummed her a tune,
As she bundled the child
In a blanket cocoon.

"You're the best mommy ever;
"I really love you."
The clone smiled & sighed,
"And I love you, too."

The mom frowned & said,
"Sorry, Santa, no deal."
That's my child's LOVE
She is trying to steal."

Smiling wisely, Santa said,
"To me it is clear,
"Only one loving mother
"Is needed here."

The mom kissed her child
And tucked her in bed.
"Thank You, Santa,
for clearing my head.

"I sometimes forget
"That it won't be very long
"When they'll be too old
"For my cradle & song."

The clock on the mantle
Began to chime.
Santa whispered to the clone,
"It works every time."

With the clone by his side,
Santa said "Goodnight.
"Merry Christmas, dear Mom.
"You will be all right."

Sometimes we need reminding of what life is all about.
Especially at times during the holiday season, when all we seem to do is
clean and bake and shop and and and and and and and....You get the picture,I'm sure.

So stop for a moment and hug that little one so special,
whether he/she is 2 months or 22 years, or even older than that.

Counting my blessings

Ack. It is 2:20 a.m. and I'm still up and making banana bread for Army of Dad to take to his co-workers and buddies tomorrow. It has been one of those days that never seems to end. My back hurts, my foot hurts and I'm losing my voice (which may be a good thing because it means I can't yell!).

I'm taking a break from the kitchen while the banana bread bakes and I check my email. I have one from my sister-in-law. In it is a Christmas card picture from the 3-year-old little girl I blogged about back in August. She was diagnosed with cancer and is doing as well as can be expected. The picture snapped me back to reality. The oldest child is disabled and the baby is bald from cancer treatments. Wow. Somehow my sassy little bastard 5-year-old and refusing-to-nap toddler seem like blessings! Pickle and I baked cookies tonight, too. It is an annual tradition for us. We've been doing it since he was a toddler. So, that was nice.

Off to bathe before I get the banana bread out of the oven and crash for a few hours before starting all over again in the morning.


Day from hell

This has been the day from hell. I hate these kinds of days.

I was busy this morning preparing last minute packages that needed to be mailed and take to Army of Dad so he could UPS them from his work. I actually screwed up one address, which sucked, but we got it fixed. I had to mail a couple USPS because they were going to post office boxes and UPS won't deliver to a PObox. Anyway. So, I did that with two kids in tow. Then, we went to have lunch with Army of Dad in Plano. The baby fell asleep, so I had to wake her up and she never finished her nap after that. We return back to our hometown and battled the mall traffic. I hate that, by the way. I freaking hate shopping the week or two before Christmas and that is one reason why I do all my shopping before December comes around. Well, I had a few last minute things to pick up including this book my eldest wants REALLY bad. So, I went to search for it to no avail. No one is helping me and I try to call Uzz and I can't get a signal in the Barnes and Noble. That pissed me off, too. I was getting more and more antsy when Hot Rod decides that I'm on the phone, I'll pull that "I'm going to do whatever I want to" shit because she's on the phone and won't do anything. I almost killed him right there in the store. No book there. We go to the next place, Best Buy. Pick up needed item there. The tag it was hanging on said "instant $2 rebate" but when I paid for it, nothing. So, I have to go back and get in line at the customer service desk. The lines are jacked, at best, and people keep cutting and I can feel my blood pressure rising again and again. Finally get my $2.17. Walk down to Michael's to get a couple of things there. I forgot to get Army of Dad some goodies he needed, so I'll be going back out tonight for them. We head to Brookshire's to get groceries. The kids are hungry, so I break out some chocolate chip cookies for them. We come home and I unload the groceries when the Christian rehab calls.

*sigh* Gets even better here. I get to hear how my brother resented me my whole life because my parents did more for me than they did for him. I get to hear about these bad things that happened to him and then he springs on me that he was hurt that I didn't name one of my two sons after him. WTF? He has treated me like shit my entire adult life and I'm supposed to want to name my kids after him? Seriously. That one blew me away. Anyway.

Pickle comes home and his dad accidentally spilled coffee on my crappy-ass slipcover for the couch, so that is one more pain in the ass that I have to deal with. I need to sweep, mop, clean and bake four banana breads for Army of Dad's coworkers.

Tuesday I will be gone all day. Pickle has a specialist appointment at 9:30 a.m. in Cowtown. Then I'm going for the job interview at 3:30. I'll take the kiddos to my mom's house while I do that. I just don't know what to do. I guess I'll get some info tomorrow.

I'll be glad when this day is over. I normally wouldn't be so worried about things, but Wednesday I'm having my surgery and I know I'll be out of it Wednesday and Thursday. I'm anxious, too, about the surgery. I know all will be well, but it is always scary to go under anesthesia and them messing with my foot is scary, too. Sort of attached to my right foot.

Off to sweep and mop. *sigh*


I had a post that I wrote a couple of days ago to post, but for some reason, it is all messed up and screws with the template on my blog, so I guess I'll completely rework it. I don't know. Sort of ruins what I was going to blog about this morning.

I have soooo much to do before my surgery on Wednesday and very little time to do it in. So, I'm off to do some last minute Christmas shopping and some grocery shopping before going to have lunch with Army of Dad at his work. I have a 4 p.m. phone conversation that I dread. Long story that I won't go into, but my brother is in a Christian-based rehab to try and get his life in order. I think this rehab and its counselors are full of shit and are going to screw him up worse than he already is. They have already cut my mom out of his life and I fear that I'll be next because if they ask me what I think about all this, I fear that I won't be able to hold my tongue and I'll tell them that I halfway expect them to be handling snakes soon. *taking deep breaths* But, whatever. I'll see what happens when I talk to these folks this afternoon. Wish me luck.

I may be going back into the workforce for six to nine months, too. Say a few prayers for me to make the best decision for my family. I'm really torn. I don't want to put my kids in daycare, but if I can do it for a few months and pay off some bills in that time, then life may be a whole lot easier next fall when I'm back to my normal routine.


Farting in a crowd

First off, I can't believe I'm blogging about this, but it is too damn funny not to.

Ok, I admit it. I have been a gassy kind of gal today. I could make flowers wilt with the bombs I was dropping ALL freaking day long. Being the Southern lady that I am, I was mortified 99.9 percent of the time and did my best to be discreet by excusing myself to the bathroom or hiding in a part of the house where no-one was going to be at. But, tonight, I took Hot Rod to Six Flags for some special time in which he got to pick what we did and how often. So, he wanted to go to Snow Hill to sled. Since we live in Texas and only get to sled maybe - MAYBE - once a year down our driveway, I humored the child. The lines were atrocious tonight, nothing like the little things we waited in on Friday. Everyone and their dog went to Six Flags tonight. Anyway. We're waiting in this line that weaves and winds and I feel the urge. Oh no, I'm thinking. There are people ALL around me. So, I wait until we're standing next to a trash can and let it rip. My farts are silent, but deadly, as friends and family will attest. So, this group of about four little girls behind me starts going at it:

Wow! That really stinks!
Is it the trashcan? Gross!
Ewww. That is so smelly
Their mom: ok, ok, it smells really bad. Can you stop talking about it?

I'm stifling back a giggle at having tricked them when one of the two ladies in front of me reaches up to cover her nose and starts looking all around her to find the guilty culprit. About this time, I lean over and start talking to Hot Rod about something. He never noticed. Poor kid may have been used to it by then.

As the smell dissipates, I'm absolutely in a full giggle, but working incredibly hard to stifle it. I had those little chuckles that no one can hear, but if they're looking at you, they see your chest and shoulders shaking. I'm actually laughing about it now in retrospect.

It is hard for me to believe that something so nasty can erupt from my voluptuous ass. Scary may be a better word.

On a lighter and happier note, Hot Rod got to meet the bulk of the University of Cincinnati Bearcats football team at Six Flags tonight. The Bearcats will face Marshall University in the Fort Worth Bowl this Thursday. UC did a fabulous job of decking out the players in their football jerseys and UC warmup suits and gave each of them a stack of glossy 8x10 team photos complete with autograph spots on the bottom of the front and entire back. Each player also had a Sharpie, too. It was wonderful and the kid about died. He was soooo excited to get to meet these guys and talk to them. The players were really nice, too. So, that was quite the unexpected treat. Of course, this is the ONE time that I didn't take my camera with me to Six Flags. *doh* But, he got a UC football poster and two 8x10s with many autographs to hang in his room. Maybe, he'll get to go to the game on Thursday, but we'll likely just watch it. The game will be on ESPN at 5:30 p.m. Central time.

Pickle got to meet an elf and the Harley Santa this weekend. Very cute pic. Go check it out and have a giggle. I was, personally, shocked that he didn't have his picture made with the Santa Hoochies.

Beware the waterworks

The holidays always make me cry. That isn't saying alot, because I'm a cryer. But, seriously, everything seems to hit me a little harder during the holidays. I feel so blessed to have all that I do in my life: a wonderful (albeit Type A personality) husband, beautiful and energetic (is that the PC way to say it?) children, a fabulous family, great friends, a nice house, etc. etc.

But, I know it is bad when a commercial for the NFL makes me cry. *sigh*

The commercial shows Plaxico "my mom was smoking crack when she named me" Burress catching a TD pass and then running to the sideline and handing the football to this precious little boy, who proceeds to run down to his dad and then the exchanges of high fives. The commercial ends with a caption "It is truly better to give than to receive." To which I start choking back the tears. Good Lord. It sucks to be this emotional. I mean, I know it is who I am and I know it is what drives me to try to achieve Super-Stardom (picture me doing the Mary Katherine - sometimes when I get nervous, I stick my hands under my arms and then *sniff* - SUPERSTAR!) .... anyway.

Back to cooking and watching my Cowboys LEAD - yes you read that right - LEAD the Eagles at halftime!!!! Okay, so it is only 7-6, but still. Figures. I've got McNabb on my fantasy team and I'm playing Army of Dad this week. Great. He is going to kill me.

Six Flags kiddos

Note to self: taking two small children to Six Flags by yourself on a Friday night is not good for your sanity (or lack thereof). Honestly, they were pretty good. But, it was just rough on my back. We started off by going to see Santa Claus (again. This was our second Santa visit of the day - more than they've had this season). Little Bit warmed up a bit to this Santa and held his hand, which was a big move for her. EVERYONE at Six Flags was so nice. I was so impressed. The families visiting were friendly and the staff was outstanding. A grubby (the nickname for the staff who walks around sweeping up trash) asked if I wanted him to take a picture of me with the kids. The staff at every ride and attraction was above ordinary in their friendliness. I need to call Six Flags and brag to them. There are bathrooms just outside of the gates and as we were leaving, I asked Hot Rod if he needed to potty and he said yes. Well, those bathrooms were closed, so I told him he was out of luck. A maintenance supervisor overheard us and took us back into the park to use the bathrooms inside there. He didn't have to do that, but my son's bladder (and his mom's minivan) were very appreciative! It was just great. The kids were pretty good. Hot Rod wanted to do certain rides over and over, but I encouraged him to let us do things that Little Bit wanted to do, too. So, it was good. Hot Rod rode a little roller coaster and made friends with another little boy on it. We sledded down the snow hill. Hot Rod did it all by himself and Little Bit rode down with me. Thank God for the boys working there. They kept us safe and they were great. We rode the big train and then the antique cars before making our way to the Yosemite Sam cave ride and then to the Spongebob 4D. That is where you see the kids with the 3D glasses. The pic with the lit longhorn was outside the Yosemite Sam ride. I'm taking Hot Rod back tonight for some special Mommy and Me time. Little Bit gets time with daddy for some bonding. Fortunately AoD didn't have to work today after all. He is going to go shooting and I'm going to watch the Cowboys get decimated by the Eagles.


Santa visits

The mall Santa is a beautiful one this year, but the company that mans the thingee won't let you take pictures with your own camera any more and a Polaroid is about $9.95! Can you believe it? But, we have a way around it. The local Wells Fargo brings in the most incredible Santa Claus for the kiddos. The best part, they let you take your own pictures AND they'll give you a Polaroid shot, too, for free. Additionally, they have candy canes, coloring books, popcorn, candy and punch for everyone. It is great and I really appreciate. So, we take the kids to Wells Fargo each year to get their pictures made. Little Bit is still not sure what she thinks of this guy. But, she looked fabulous in her little dress. So cute.

I took the two little ones to Six Flags Friday night, too. I'll post those pictures on Sunday most likely. Army of Dad is working -again - today for his company's inventory. Since he manages the warehouse, he gets to be in charge. Even worse, his boss' daughter graduated from college today, so he is in charge of everyone. We have been strangers passing in the night lately. His kids are so excited when they get to see him because he leaves before they awake and returns after they're in bed. I'm going to a Christmas party with a friend tonight. She works with a bunch of women and they decided to make it a girls-only event, so she invited me instead of her hubby. So, I have a date. *wink*


Put me on this jury PLEASE!

Ok, let me first off say that I was intrigued by a story about a man being identified as an expert on Pop-Tarts. That got me interested in seeing what possible court case this could be. And, then it gets even better. First off, this dipshit puts a frosted Pop-Tart in his toaster. Ok, bad choice No. 1. Bad choice No. 2 comes when he leaves the house with said frosted Pop-Tart in the toaster. Guess what? Dipshit's house burns down. Ok, his homeowners insurance pays up and he'll be paying giant premiums (even higher than the rest of ours, which are pretty damned high already) because of his stupidity. But, in our litigious society that we live in ... guess what? Dipshit sues the manufacturer of the toaster. Good God. I really fucking hate trial lawyers. Any asshole who would take this case should have flaming hot Pop-Tart icing dripped on his nuts.

It is called user error. I'm guessing when some stupid woman leaves a candle burning unattended and it sets her house on fire, she can sue the Yankee Candle company? Oops, I probably gave someone an idea. *smacking myself on the forehead*

ARGH!!!! This makes me want to explode. But, wait, I got off the original track. The Pop-Tart expert was hired by the toaster company to help defend them and say it wasn't the toaster that caused the fire, but a flaming Pop-Tart. I swear to God, I can't make up stuff this good. Really. I. Can't.

Christmas cookies and dilemmas

Whew! Talk about multi-tasking. I was making homemade Christmas cookies for Boo's school party this afternoon while doing a job interview on the phone. Yes, you heard me. A job interview. Yikes! A former boss of mine, who has recruited me to do several jobs, emailed me this morning about filling a temporary position where he works. It would be a great opportunity to do something I enjoy while expanding my repertoire a bit and taking on some supervisory positions as well. Temporary, in this case, means six to nine months. It is all contingent on a giant construction project. When it is completed, the job is done. But, it sounds fun and exciting. The extra income could help facilitate a speedier repayment of our bills, but it will also mean putting the kids in daycare. The boys could go to after-school care provided at the school through the city.

Too many things to think about ... off to run errands and let my mind clear.

National Guard recruitment is down

Well what do you expect? But, you know what? The news accounts make it out to be because of the year-long deployments or extensions of military time before they get to rotate home. That plays a role, but the local radio news was making a big deal out of it being because the soldiers don't want to go to Iraq and Afghanistan. I'm calling bullshit on this. There may be some like that, but most soldiers I know WANT to be in the action and WANT to help their brothers at arms. I know Army of Dad would be packing his ruck right now if he could go and help the others. Every time a soldier dies, it injures him a little and makes him want to go even more. I look at him funny every time he says that. Finally, the other day he said "Maybe if I were there and doing the job right, those soldiers would be alive today." Ok, that makes sense to me.

But, the MAIN reason most former soldiers don't join the National Guard is for one major reason - the money. If Army of Dad was in the National Guard right now, he'd likely be called up and deployed for a year - stateside or abroad. Regardless, he would take a paycut so large that I'd either have to go back to work full-time and put the kids in daycare or we'd have to sell the house and move in with my parents while he was gone. He makes at least four times what he made when he left the Army. It may be more than that, actually. We could not survive on what his National Guard pay would be and THAT is the ONLY reason I think AoD hasn't joined the guard. I actually encouraged him to do it when he left the Army. I figured it would be good extra income and I never thought we'd go to war. I think most of the men and women in the National Guard thought the same thing. That is why they're bitching so much. THIS isn't what we expected! Well, AoD had the forethought to think of it. This story does a good job of telling it like it is, but because it is focused on recruiting young soldiers, it doesn't touch on the pay issue. I wish someone in the media would. That is a great disparity. Our men and women serve this country and I know many military families on food stamps because they get paid so little that they can't pay their bills. THAT to me is the greatest tragedy here. I'd pay more taxes for THAT!


Happy hopped up kids

Hot Rod had his Christmas party at school today and he was one happy camper! Little Bit went with me and she was loving life. The kids had pizza and cookies. Of course, my children are too much like me - they LOVE icing on their cookies. Hot Rod had a gift exchange in his class and got some new Crayolas and two Spiderman coloring books. Not too shabby. He looked pretty cute wearing the garland that decorated his gift.

Little Bit was REALLY enjoying that cookie.

More transplant info

I visited my cousin last night and she is doing spectacular! I was so shocked to see how alert, happy and good she looked. The 14 months of dialysis and two years of going through the effects of kidney failure have taken their toll on her, but overall, she looks great.

I got a little 411 on the whole thing. She said her kidneys had actually grown together while she was a fetus and she has a horse-shaped kidney. Weird, but had no effect on any of this. Just an unusual thing. But, what I thought was weird was that they put the transplanted kidney in and leave the old ones in there. She said they will atrophy as the new kidney takes over. Weird, huh? Evidently it is less stressful on the body to just leave them in there than to remove them. She showed me her arm where she took the dialysis and it looks awful. It is all purple and has giant growth-looking things on it. Evidently, this happens to dialysis patients because of how hard it is on the veins and the arteries. It won't ever go away, either, she said. Patients who have undergone dialysis for longer periods look worse, she said. Bless her heart. It doesn't hurt, though. Just looks gross, so I guess that is a plus. She said she got her kidney from a 24-year-old man who was brain dead after overdosing on drugs. Totally bizarre thing that none of his organs were damaged from the drug use. I'm guessing for his family, it was at least one positive thing to come from his death - that he saved others. We talked a lot about how she is doing and feeling and talked about my hair and what kind of haircut I should get. She is a hairstylist, after all, and used to do my hair when I was in high school. She said she can't wait to get back to work.

She thanked everyone for their prayers and asked that you continue to pray for her that her body will continue to respond favorably to the transplant.

Best way to avoid having sex

Not that this ever happens to me because I'm usually asking for it, but I've discovered a sure fire way to get Army of Dad OUT of the mood - say "I'm real freaky naughty" in the Ben Stiller voice from Dodgeball.

*cracking up*

He REALLY does NOT like that! You can see it at the end of the trailer.

*still laughing*

10 minutes to kill? I have just the distraction

I chuckled at the good-hearted fun of the White House staff for this Christmas season.

If you go to the White House holiday site and then check out the BarneyCam: Where in the White House is Miss Beazley? You can get it in two different formats, but it is a hoot. It also will show people that President Bush isn't a liar because the man can't act to save his life. The best parts of the approximately nine-minute video is a little tour of the White House and its holiday decorations. But, there are some totally hilarious parts featuring Karl Rove taking the blue ornaments off the Christmas tree and replacing them with red ones. Barney gets in on one of Scott McClellan's press conferences. You'll also see Andy Card and Josh Bolten along with Mrs. Cheney.

But, the purpose of the video is to announce that President and Mrs. Bush are having an addition to the family. Yes, another little girl. Ok, not THAT kind of little girl - a new puppy!

It is funny and if you have the time to spare, it will give you a little chuckle. Stinkerbelle LOVED it and sat in my lap to watch the whole thing.


Cold pizza, blog-reading and kidney transplants

Eating cold pizza and catching up on blogs. I would say this is a great way to spend my lunch hour. I just spent the past hour and a half running errands. I picked up some golfballs on sale at Oshman's for my dad for Christmas. He'll love it. He usually buys cheap balls, so it will be a nice treat for him. Got some gas. Picked up a free chicken biscuit with a coupon I had and bought a soda as a treat. Went to sign up Hot Rod for a day of daycamp over the holidays and then went to pick up six dozen tamales at the school. It was a fundraiser sale and Army of Dad and I are tamale-eaters. Funny to think that he had never heard of a tamale until he came to Fort Hood.

For some funny blog reading:
Bad haircuts - I totally agree about this style.
Sgt. Hook plans to hang up his blog. I'm bummed about this. He did so much good.
Sweet Courtship story - I really like this. Every girl's favorite love story - she resisted, he pursued, she acquiesced.
Review of The Village that will make you laugh. I wanted to see this stinker and will rent it at some point, but she makes the same point Army of Dad did - a village of men and no guns to shoot the monsters? yeah right.
An Early Christmas Present for porn-lovers everywhere.
Got to love dancing babies
Pot stickers recipe that I'll have to try. Really bad joke though trying to play on the "its getting hot in herre" song. But, an A for effort. This guy must have about as much ghetto in him as I do.
Harry Potter Book 6 may be on the way!

Talked to my cousin this morning, too. I plan to go see her tonight. I may look like Michael Jackson with a little mask on, but just in case my sniffles are more than allergies, better safe than sorry. She is doing awesome. She got one kidney in the transplant - the right one - and is doing great. She thought she was going to the hospital Monday for bloodwork and learned about midnight Sunday that it was more than just a blood test for a cross-match, but the surgery was scheduled for 7:30 a.m. Monday. She said there were many times that she was called to go do bloodwork for a possibility of transplant, but she knew that every blood test brought her one step closer. So, she was stoked. She had very little function in her kidneys when she went it. I don't understand all this, so if I screw it up, sorry. She said the creatin level in her kidneys was 5.9 before the surgery. The higher it is, the worse it is, she said. Two days after surgery, her level is down to 4.something. Two is normal and the goal, she said. Because the kidney is kept on ice before the transplant, she said that often a transplant patient has to undergo dialysis for days, weeks or months to get the kidney to work right. Hers was working immediately! She said she anticipated being on the waiting list for another year, so this was a fantastic Christmas present and surprise. Her only disappointment - and it is a slight one - is that she will be in isolation for about 30 days. She can have guests, but can't venture out. The doctor cautioned her to stay away from children and she was heartbroken at the aspect of Christmas without her grandchildren. (Makes me feel old to have a cousin with grandkids - her grandkids are the same age as my children, but she is actually old enough to be my mother.) But, she is so excited to get back on her feet and return to working.

I am looking forward to seeing her tonight.

Pinball thinking

Do you know what I mean when I say that? Imagine the thoughts in your mind bouncing off one thing and hitting another and bouncing in a totally different direction than you expected - THAT is pinball thinking. I do it often.

It started this morning when I was thinking about how to explain my plantar fasciitis surgery that I'm having a week from today. The doctor isn't going to do anything to the actual bone spur on my foot and he explained that it is not what is causing the pain. Of course, I can't repeat all he said, but suffice it to say that he described the bottom of your foot as having a long thick band that stretches from your heel to your toes and mine tore from stress - being athletic and active combined with having too large of an ass to carry around - usually causes that stress. So, when it tears, it bleeds and the bone thinks it needs to grow more bone to fix it and that is what causes the spur. So, he is going to use this Topaz machine to go in and essentially poke little holes in the band and stretch it so it won't tear anymore. *shrug* We'll see how it goes. I'll be placed in a splint at the hospital and get crutches there, too. I go back on the 28th to have the splint removed and a cast put on for two weeks. Joy upon joys. I'll have to learn to drive with my left foot. Beware any white minivans you see on the roads for the next few weeks.

I had to go to the hospital and have some bloodwork done. Fortunately, no x-rays or any of that shit. But, I did see the creepy little x-ray tech who made me feel dirty (and not in a good way) while I was waiting. This is where my pinball thinking this morning went terribly wrong.

I started thinking about how violated I felt at the simple touch of this man. It was unwanted and just didn't feel right. I still get the willies when I think about it. And, it made me feel sad for women who are raped and violated and then, from the deep recesses of my mind and memories, I started to recall the time I was date-raped in college by a boy I was seeing. Yes, I share a small tidbit of the blame for putting myself in a compromising position. Had I used better judgment, it likely would have never happened. But, I used to be one of the most trusting people on the face of the planet. I am still fairly trusting, but I tend to be much more guarded these days and this is one reason why. He was a pre-med student at Baylor with me. He was planning on attending dental school after our graduation. He was tall, maybe 6'2. I always liked tall guys. He was blond and had a thin-athletic build. He was in one of those frats for smart guys, not a traditional frat and I liked that about him, too. I can't remember how we met. He lived in the same apartment complex as me. TC seemed like the perfect gentleman. We went out a time or two and he never made a move. I had three roommates and we shared a two-bedroom apartment. The girl I shared a room with was home, so I borrowed the other room as those girls were out of town that weekend. I always loved to snuggle up next to someone when I slept. It gave me great comfort and made me feel safe. I often fell asleep in my boyfriend's arms in high school and he would slip his arm out from under me and go home when I did that. I had told TC that I liked doing that and asked if he wanted to stay the night with me. We mugged (the 80s/early 90s term at Baylor or making out, smooching, whatever you want to call it) for a while and then I fell asleep. I awoke to find myself pushing him off of me. He apparently slipped off my shorts and panties while I was sleeping and I slept right through it. He was on top of me and raping me. I awoke and started yelling NO, STOP IT, GET OFF. Then, he put his hand over my mouth and told me to relax. He pushed my hands down and held me down. I eventually gave up. I honestly can't remember what happened after that. I remember telling my girlfriends what happened the next day. I vividly remember going to the apartment of one of my friends - she lived in the same complex - and telling her what happened. She told me that I was overreacting and that he was a good guy. When I got back to the apartment, the fucker had sent me a dozen long-stem roses. I remember thinking I was going to be sick when I saw them. I also remember thinking that everyone would blame me and say I was asking for it if I turned him in. It happened once before at Baylor. One of former Vice President Dan Quayle's aides raped a Baylor student. She had met him at a bar and visited him in his hotel room. I remember everyone on campus painting her as some whore for going to his hotel room. What did she expect? they all said. When you go to a man's hotel room, you are sending him the signal that you're willing, they said. It made me sick. It also was made clear to me that no one would believe me if I accused him of rape. I was so ashamed and felt it was my fault. I even continued dating him after that for a few weeks feeling that I was to blame. I led him on and encouraged it.

TC had the audacity to send me an invitation to his wedding after we graduated from college. I started to go, just to tell his bride-to-be that she is marrying a rapist. But, I decided to let it go. Uzz was very understanding about the whole thing and wanted to kill him. Poor Army of Dad. He, too, has had to live with what this did to me. During one encounter with AoD, he accidentally put his hand on my throat and I completely freaked out. I had blocked out TC doing that to me until that very moment and then the rape came flashing back clearly in my head. I crawled away from AoD and cowered in the corner of the bed. He finally calmed me down and got me to tell him what happened and I thought he was going to drive to South Texas that very moment and kill him. He tried to make me tell him TC's name and I refused because I was afraid of what he would do. I don't think I've ever told him this animal's name. It has taken years for me to let someone touch my neck, but I have learned to trust the right people again. Funny, that was 16 years ago and I'm still shaking as I write this. I don't think any of my friends but that one college girl (who was later my roommate), Uzz and AoD even know about this. I am not sure what made me want to write it today. One thing I have known since I have had children though is that my boys know that NO means NO and that Stinkerbelle doesn't put herself in compromising positions. No one ever asks to be raped, but there are times when you can lessen your chance of having it happen to you.

Every time I hear cases about women who claim to be raped and men don't believe them, it hurts and it hurts bad. I feel like I've been violated again. And, I swear to God, if I ever find a woman who cried rape and really wasn't, I will give her a piece of my mind because it is those women who keep women like me from telling the authorities.


Sports stuff

This sounds infinitely more interesting to me as a Superbowl halftime show than does Paul McCartney. All I can say is that if Paul shows us a tit, I may lose my lunch. But, then again, his tits may be about as perky as Janet's were, too.

This is kind of neat, especially in light of my cousin's transplant success Monday. The Mavericks are hosting Organ Donor Night in honor of Alonzo Mourning - the NBA player who just received a kidney transplant from his cousin. Some 50 North Texas organ transplant recipients will appear on the court at the American Airlines Center during halftime of tonight's home game againstthe New Jersey Nets to represent the 50 lives that can be saved by one organ donor.

That is remarkable. 50 lives by one donor. You can sign an organ donor card, but you need to make your next of kin aware of your wishes. Even if you have signed a donor card, but your spouse, parent, legal guardian, whoever opposes it, it is their wish that the doctors will follow.

But, anyway ... still thinking I may pay $5 or whatever to see naked chicks over Paul McCartney unless their a special South Park during halftime. I remember watching Beavis and Butthead years ago and the Man Show I think had something last year or the year before.

New gift idea

I'm just thinking if this pillow could spread her legs, then millions of men may want one for Christmas. As it is, it just looks plain twisted. How sad and pathetic are you if you WANT/NEED one of these. At least a spread set like this has a purpose.

Doing the dance of love

Today today, it comes out today! Hot damn it comes out today!

Ok, so I'm paraphrasing the dad in one of my holiday favorites A Christmas Story, but it comes out today! What am I blabbering about incessantly? Why, Lord of the Rings, of course. The extended version of all three is out today. It is the ONLY thing I asked for this Christmas from Army of Dad and I'm so excited.

I'll be doing the dance of love till I open it Christmas morning. Ok, well after Dec. 22, I'll be on crutches and won't be doing any dancing for a few days, but in my heart I'll be doing the dance of love. I'm heading to the doctor after I drop off Stinkerbellet at preschool. I'll be doing my pre-op appointment for my bone spur surgery. After that, I'm sure I'll go to the hospital to do more pre-op tests. I just hope I don't get the lab tech who tried to feel me up last time. Let me clarify that, I WON'T get the lab tech who gave me the creepies last time.

Uzz let me borrow his Elf DVD, so we'll probably watch that this week. Army of Dad and I get to celebrate tonight sans children at his company's annual holiday bash complete with tasty food, lots of beer and soda and a white elephant gift exchange. Should be fun. Tomorrow, I have a Christmas party in Arlington with the indpendent public relations group I belong to. Thursday, Friday and all weekend, Army of Dad is doing an inventory of the warehouse he manages. So, we won't see each other hardly at all. Yikes.


Holiday happiness

I received good news about my cousin. Her new kidney (not sure if she got one or two, second hand news from my mom) began working before she was out of recovery! What a Christmas blessing for her! My aunt was there when she came out of recovery and my cousin reached out and grabbed her mother's hand and said "Mom, I can feel them working!"

Thanks for all of your prayers and good wishes.

I took Hot Rod to deliver some gifts we picked up for the children at the local state home. We work really hard to have the children understand the importance of helping those less fortunate. We have our soccer team participate in the local soccer association's food drive for Make A Difference Day and we talk to them about what it must be like to go to bed hungry and help them feel a need to help. We take toiletries to the Salvation Army shelter and give old items to the Goodwill store. Christmas, though, seems to be one of those times when it really hits me. I have a friend who grew up in the ghetto of Dallas and he has shared many stories with me about getting nothing for Christmas except maybe a checkers game from the local youth center. That just breaks my heart. I had Hot Rod carry the little bag into the restaurant where we leaving our gifts. He took the bag in and put it under the tree and was thanked by the host there. He asked me why we were giving those presents and I got all choked up when I explained that some kids don't have families that can take good care of them and this lets them get gifts on Christmas, too. I have a second cousin who lives in a group home because she became too hard to care for by my cousin and his wife. It was sad and it was a hard decision for them to place her there, but she was so strong and non-compliant that it was awful for them. I've seen this girl in action and she is dangerous because she is incapable of reasoning. I don't know that she has the mental faculties of a toddler, but she seems to be happy there. She is one of the lucky ones because her family cares and visits. But, the people at the state home have it hard and some are essentially abandoned there by their families.

I highly encourage you to give to those less fortunate - especially this holiday season. Army of Dad received the following request:

The young men and women who are at Walter Reed have given a lot. Now it is our turn to help them. Yellow ribbons tied around trees and red, white and blue stickers on the backs SUVs saying "Support our Troops" are things that make civilians feel good but do nothing for the men and women actually in uniform. So please consider the following:
The number ONE request at Walter Reed hospital is phone cards. The government doesn't pay long distance phone charges and these wounded soldiers are rationing their calls home. Many will be there throughout the holidays. Really support our troops --Send phone cards of any amount to:

Medical Family Assistance Center
Walter Reed Medical Center
6900 Georgia Avenue, NW
Washington, DC 20307-5001

They say they need an "endless" supply of these -- any amount even $5 is greatly appreciated.

NOTE: ANYONE can also buy phone cards through the PX on line by going to this web address: (They will even mail them to a specific Soldier if you have their address)

Top 10 movies of the year

The American Film Institute released its list of the Top 10 Movies of the Year for 2004.

THE AVIATOR - I want to see it
COLLATERAL - don't remember it
FRIDAY NIGHT LIGHTS - its a renter for me
THE INCREDIBLES - plan to see it over Christmas. My kids have seen it and love it.
KINSEY - probably a renter, but I'd like to see it. I studied this guy's work in college. Ok, so I study his subject EVERY day when I can!
MARIA FULL OF GRACE -don't remember it
MILLION DOLLAR BABY - don't remember it
SIDEWAYS - doesn't ring a bell either
SPIDER-MAN 2 - saw it two or three times at the movies and will eventually buy it

I thought the Polar Express was pretty good and am surprised it isn't on the list. Your thoughts?

Say a prayer, please

My cousin is undergoing a kidney transplant today. She has been on the waiting list for probably two years or more. She is such an energetic go-getter despite being on dialysis for what seems like forever to me. As a hairdresser, she had to close her shop because she couldn't run it anymore while being on dialysis, but she continued fixing hair despite it.

I wanted to be tested to see if I could be a living donor, but Army of Dad asked me not to because the chances of complications are greater for the donors than they are the recipients and he reminded me that I have three children who need me. I'm not sure if all of my cousins were tested or not, but I'm sure they probably were. I know my aunt was and she was not a match.

I'm a very big proponent of transplants and hope that when I die, it is in such a circumstance that my organs, tissues, bones - anything viable - can be transplanted into someone who needs them. It is such a gift for a family to give life to others at the time of a tragedy. I don't know the circumstances of my cousin's donor at this point, but I'm sure it must be from someone who died and not a living donor or we would have known about it in advance. My mom called this morning at 6:45 a.m. and told me that she got the call late last night that she'd be having it done today. Funny, she went to my mom's house yesterday and fixed her hair for her. I guess it is a good thing she did, too, or she'd be waiting a while! I'm going to try and go see her this week, if I can. If I'm still congested I can't do it and don't want to take a chance on exposing her to anything.

I'll try to keep everyone posted on her progress, but keep her in your prayers, please.


Last day to vote!

Today is the last day to vote for me in the 2004 Wizbang Blog Awards. So, please go cast one more vote. Since I got a late start in the campaigning and didn't even realize I had made the cut until about four days into the voting, I think I made a pretty presentable run for third. Please help me take third solidly and alone! Thanks.

Learning is fun

I love taking the children to the museum because it is one of those times when they don't realize that they're learning from their play and we have such a good time. My mother, bless her soul, gave my family a membership for our Christmas gift this year, so we took advantage of it for the first time on Saturday. It is very cool because it includes free Imax movies and we were able to call ahead and reserve our seats without having to stand in line to even get a spot for the next show. So, that was cool, too.

Pickle had a ball making ENORMOUS bubbles that fit over his body. The baby enjoyed watching that. An ancient docent was making smaller bubbles with his hands for Stinkerbelle and she thought that was grand. Hot Rod found a little device that had a conveyer belt and a little funnel that hung from a pendulum over it. Little scientists can pour sand into the funnel and move it to make designs and watch the sand travel down the conveyor belt and into a bucket. Then they could see how, as the sand diminished in the funnel, how the pattern on the conveyor belt got smaller and thinner. It was grand fun to a 5-year-old. But, the two little ones really love Kidspace and Pickle makes the best out of it with the water stuff. He loves to change the way the currents flow and dam it up and frustrate the hell out of the little kids. It is sort of funny in a sadistic way. He only does it briefly before he launches some little boat down the river and watches it flow. Stinkerbelle and Hot Rod love it, too. They also have a little grocery store section with barcode scanners, shopping carts, a cash register and all the goodies. It is a miniature version of HEB and they love it. Of course, Pickle is my countdown watch. He kept asking what time it was and how much longer till the movie. He loved it. So did the other two. We saw it last Christmas, too, so I didn't feel like I was missing anything and caught a little catnap in the middle of it.

Starting last Christmas season, I took a picture of the children in this Dino Tub. I may make it an annual tradition to see how they've grown!

Here is one example of the giant bubbles hewas making. He was making some big enough to cover him!

Hot Rod with the sand thing.

All three kids REALLY like the water table.

It was a lot of fun and the children were well-behaved, so that made it nice. We treated the kids to McDonald's for lunch and the two little ones played on the playground there, as well. They both crashed in the car on the drive home. Army of Dad and I got to go out last night. We did a little bit of Christmas shopping after dinner and rented Dodgeball. I laughed my ass off AGAIN. He thought it was moderately funny, but those Dodgeball scenes are hilarious. Not for the kiddos, but funny FUNNY stuff to me.


Xbox widow

Army of Dad enjoyed his Christmas bonus today with the purchase of an Xbox live set up. I'm never going to see him again, I fear.

Words I never thought I'd hear from my husband: "I hear a warthog."

What the hell is that all about? Gees. Boys with their expensive toys.

Saturday morning

Damn. What a story to wake up to when a 13-year-old boy is convicted of raping an old lady. That shit is just scary. What kind of kid would do this? I was getting in trouble for beating up little boys when I was 13. That was about as bad as I could be. I think I anonymously left a bottle of Prell or some other shampoo whose slogan was to "get the greasies out" in a girl's locker because she intentionally slicked her hair down and it always looked greasy. She was not a very nice person. However, I still felt bad for doing that.


It is a Saturday morning and I'm tired beyond belief. I cleaned like a madwoman yesterday and we decorated our tree FINALLY. We had some friends coming over for dinner and the house had been a wreck. The house looks great, but I'm considering getting a St. Bernard to help retrieve anyone who tries to venture into our walk-in closet. Army of Dad told me to employ the avalanche recovery team if he didn't return from his trek to get a clean shirt last night. We had fun and stayed up laughing way too late.

I'm off to take the boys to get haircuts and donuts, after that, me and the kids are going to meet my mom in Fort Worth to go to the Fort Worth Museum of Science and History. She got me a family membership for Christmas this year. The kids are excited because we're going to go see Santa vs. the Snowman at the Omni musuem. Tonight is a date night as we get to go eat at a relatively new little chi-chi restaurant downtown. Our soccer team gave us a $50 gift card to the place, so we'll go check it out and then go see a movie tonight. I think Team America World Police as well as the Sky Captain and whatever it is movies are playing at the local $2 show. Should be nice. Tomorrow, I'm going to fix my Christmas cards while I watch football. Sounds like a great weekend as I count down to surgery and being on crutches.


Would you believe ...

Five things about me that most people would NEVER believe. Hell, I have a hard time believing them about myself:

1. I voted for Clinton/Gore in 92 and 96.

2. I used to have a picture of Al Gore on my desk in the newsroom in Durant, Okla.

3. I used to have a "I'm the face of Pro-Choice America" sticker on my car.

4. I used to have an Ann Richards shirt and worked for her Texas gubernatorial campaign as a volunteer while in college.

5. I was a registered Democrat.

Did I offend you? So sorry - now screw off!

I am so fed up with political correctness that it makes me want to spew. I don't have a single Jewish friend or acquaintance who gets his or her panties in a wad if someone says Merry Christmas to them. They just smile and nod. Occasionally, they may mention that they're Jewish and they celebrate Hannukah, but they don't start off into a moonbat-induced tirade.

WBAP radio show host Mark Davis got the area in a tizzy Thursday when he started railing on Parker County for not putting up a nativity set on the grounds because an atheist group objected. Well, he had his information incorrect. The county isn't putting up ANY displays and one reason is that no one wants to offend anyone. Some California governmental entity that I heard about won't put up their traditional holiday display because some dude got his whitey-tighties in a wad. Gees, people. Let it go. If there was some giant mennorah on the courthouse lawn or even some Kwannza (which I still feel is a made-up holiday to make black people feel good) display, I could care less. As long as there aren't human sacrifices or tributes to Charles Manson, I'm okay with all of it. I'm glad the USPS has stamps for all three winter holidays. But, some people just go too far.

Target kicking out the bell ringers because they don't want to have to allow every group who asks a spot on the front steps is yet another example to me of how everyone wants to play fair and not offend everyone. Guess what? I'm offensive. If you don't like it, take a hike. One of my dear friends cringes sometimes when I'm making fun of certain groups for their really bad driving or for wearing their pants down around their damn thighs instead of pulled up. Guess what? I'm not being hateful and I'm not saying anything that isn't true. I'm a redneck and guess what? I may cringe when you crack a redneck joke simply because it hits too close to home, but I'll admit there is truth in what you say.

WBAP had a great example of a PC Christmas song. It is pretty funny, but it is frustrating at the same time because people are REALLY like this.

Gees. I hate political correctness, although I do like a PC description of me as vertically challenged.


Christmas gift ideas

Ok, so I stole this post idea from the wonderful Joan at Seven Inches of Sense, but it is a good one. She has a list of Christmas gifts guaranteed to get you laid.

I can't add to that list much, but I will also contribute some thoughts for men who'd like to score some brownie points this holiday season for their ladies.

1) Arranging a night out - including setting up the babysitter, paying for everything and deciding where to go and what to do without her having to lift a finger.
2) Getting a housekeeper to clean the house - even just once (Joan touched on this one, but I have to add it again).
3) A little note telling her the reasons why you love her. It can even be just one reason - you have a great ass is a good one or something like, I love the way you look at me when you tell me to spank you ... oh wait, I'm sorry, that was my note to Army of Dad ... I meant something like, I love the way you look out for me and the kids, or something nicer. You get the idea and she will feel appreciated.
4) A gift certificate for a massage. It doesn't have to be expensive. We have a lady in town who does one-hour full-body massages for $30 and she does just fine. Army of Dad does good on these kinds of gifts.
5)Taking the kids out to do something fun and giving her an evening all by herself to watch whatever she wants to on the TV or send her to the movies with her friends.
6) A simple gold necklace with a charm on it. Pick a charm that has some meaning. One of the best gifts Army of Dad ever gave me was a gold w/diamond charm of a mother holding a child. I love it. Any simple piece of gold jewelry will work here. It can be a pair of hoop earrings, a gold bracelet, etc.
7)A CD of your song. Put it in the CD player before you seduce her. She'll melt to know you thought that much of her. Or it could be Nine Inch Nails' I want to fuck you like an animal. You know your gal. If that will turn her on to know that you were thinking about her and pulled that song out may get her revved up. If its not her speed, don't do it.
8)Give her flowers on Christmas Eve.
9)Find some mistletoe and pull her in your arms and tell her you are the luckiest man in the world. If you have some great gift like a piece of jewelry or perfume, this is a good time to give it to her. Otherwise, a card with a few heartfelt words would be nice.
10)A gift she has been asking for and really wants. She'll know that you heard her and she'll be so appreciative that you did.

Have you noticed a trend? Most of what I have suggested is cheap or free. You'd be amazed at just how far a simple note penned by you about how much you love her will get you.