Army of Mom

So this is how liberty dies ... with thunderous applause.


Penguins, penguins, penguins

I did a google search for plush penguin chicks because that is the BIG thing Hot Rod wants for Christmas this year. He wants a realistic looking penguin chick. So, off mom goes to look for one. I come up with a zoo story about puny penguins.

Interesting, but now what I was looking for. I was thinking more of something like this. I'm dying it is so cute. The girly squeaky high pitched Ohmigod its cute! keeps coming out of me.

This site has penguin EVERYTHING!

Wow. I also need to take a picture of the penguin drawing Pickle made for me. Very cute.

Men watch the damnedest things

Swear to God, Army of Dad was justing watching the History Channel's The Story of Wood or something equally brain numbing for me.

To borrow a line from LabKat, it is like watching paint dry. Golf is more exciting than this.

Made myself feel better by scrolling through and looking at OddTodd's Macys parade pictures. I laughed so hard I cried and almost peed on myself when I got to the floats that he affectionately named Alan Greenspan and Bea Arthur. I swear to God, I still have tears in my eyes. I'm so easily amused.

Oh God, now he has turned to the Discovery channel and they're making surfboards. Takes eight minutes for polyester(?) resin to dry. Yippee. So glad to know that. At least he isn't making me watch Iron Chef or Alton Brown.

This is why he kicks my ass at Trivial Pursuit.

The Lebanese Loop

I'm already paranoid about using my ATM card as it is. I was ripped off twice by those machines owned and operated by individuals and placed in convenience stores. The first time it happened while I was a POOR single mom. I used the ATM in the Px and the effing machine shorted me $20. May not seem like a lot, but back then it really really was. The second time I was ripped off was down the street at the Haji Mart. Effer who owned the machine gave me the run around. So, I finally called my bank and got my money back.

Never EVER again will I use a machine that isn't operated by a reputable (ok, I know that is sort of like calling criminals upstanding citizens, but you know what I mean) bank. I just won't do it.

Then, I saw some thing on one of those TV news magazines about how just anyone can get an ATM and operate it. Criminals were buying them and Poof, Average Joe was handing this guy all your banking information and access to your checking account. Uh, no thank you.

Now, I read about Odd Todd's Lebanese Loop experience. Apparently, according to Odd Todd, ATM Skimmers or Lebanese Loops are devices used to steal your ATM card or the information on it, as well as the Personal Identification Number (PIN) associated with that card. One type of skimmer is a thin, transparent-plastic overlay on an ATM keypad that captures keystrokes as they are typed while another transparent device inside the card slot captures data from the magnetic strip on the inserted card. Other skimmers are larger and fit over the entire face of the ATM.

Great, like I didn't have enough to be paranoid about already.

My new drug of choice

Sent to me courtesy of my hubby.

It's a good day

Always is when I have a hobbit on my LOTR daily calendar.

Today is Warrior Merry getting ready to kick some orc ass!

Joys of parenthood

Phone rings and I recognize the number on the caller ID as being that of the school nurse. Not sure which is worse - her calling or the fact that she calls enough that I recognize her phone number.

Nurse: AoM, this is Nurse B from the elementary school.
AoM: *taking a deep breath* Hi. What happened this time?
Nurse: *chuckling* Well, I'm not sure how to say it, but Pickle told his teacher that his 'balls were hurting.' *breaking out into uproarious laughter*
AoM: *crawling under a chair in embarrassment* Well, hmm. Guess he couldn't pick a more illustrious way to spell that out.
Nurse: *still laughing* We just thought you'd get a kick out of that.
AoM: Yeah, a kick. I imagine what probably happened is that he's itchy from not scrubbing that area well. I'll talk to him again about cleaning better in the shower. We've had to talk to him about this before and AoD explained to him what happens to guys when they dont' use good hygiene.
Nurse: Ok, well let me know what happens because I wasn't going to check him there. Told his teacher that was a job for his mom!
AoM: Sure thing. Thanks for calling.

*deep sigh*

Explained to my child that there may be better, more discreet ways of communicating with his teacher that he is experiencing phsyical discomfort such as saying, may I see the nurse? or if he requires more information first, telling her that his privates hurt or even saying testicles or scrotum. Child looked at me blankly and replied "ok." Then, I went back into the further explanation of scrubbing with soap and water and even demonstrated what it might look like if I had a scrotum *the lifting of the sac up to wash under it, etc* I'm sure that was a sight. So, with cleaning instructions in place, he was told to inform me in two or three days if the issue isn't better and then we'll go see the doctor *who happens to be a female.* How is that for incentive for the 11-year-old to cure the problem on his own?


Chugging along the Trinity

Hot Rod was thrilled to get to ride along the little train by the zoo. I used to ride this same train when I was a little kid, too. Of course, WAY back then, there was less development and less trash,which was kind of sad. He didn't care. He was still happy to see the turtles and herons.

Here we are before the train ride.

And here is the little train. Brought back so many memories.

Stupid bad guys

I really hate bad guys. I mean, really, what are they thinking? If I shoot a cop, surely they'll let me go.

Gees. There is the idiot that killed the Dallas cop a few weeks ago and now the Fort Worth cop was shot.

I really hate bad guys. I may not have the greatest respect for cops, individually, but on the whole, I know they're a hard working bunch of men and women and they certainly don't deserve to be shot because bad guys are stupid.

Lining up the shot

Army of Dad went shooting with his buddies the day after Thanksgiving and one of them sent me this shot of him shooting with his buddy's .22.

I love this.

March of the Mom

Off to run errands today and go pick up my copy of March of the Penguins, which comes out today!!! Hooray. I'm so excited. I didn't tell Hot Rod or the kids, so they will be thrilled. We may have a movie night while stringing lights on the tree and decorating.

The wisdom of cops

It never ceases to amaze me how my disdain for law enforcement can increase seeing as how I'm married to a former cop. But, I just have very little respect for these guys most days. Now, not all cops are bad. I have some very good cop friends, but I'm just saying that many of them are stupid, have little man's syndrome and like to think they are above the law themselves.

My latest rant is inspired by this quote in the Denton Record Chronicle today from Denton County Sheriff's Captain Jeff Wawro:

It's not a small town atmosphere anymore. Sometimes, it seems like the streets of Beirut out there.

Wow. Take a moment to let that sink in. Like the streets of Beirut. Huh.

I'm thinking there is a wee bit of exaggeration there. Yeah, we have our projects with the drug dealers and the gangbangers. Yeah, we have an occasional jailer who runs from the police (this happend a week or two ago causing the trooper to wreck out). Last week, the local cops had to waste a drunk UNT student who waved a gun at them and even fired first. Yeah, those all suck and that is part of the job. I still don't think we're up to the violence that happens in Beirut. And, that is just in the city. The county is still very very rural and aside from a domestic dispute between Bubba and Lula Mae or the occasional loose cattle on the farm-to-market road, I'm thinking rural Denton County isn't the streets of Beirut. Just me. Maybe Captain Wawro has been to Beirut to have a frame of reference, but I wouldn't hold my breath. I guess I had better start watching out for the truck bombs to start driving into the courthouse or be set off downtown.

*shaking my head*

Hot Rod's soccer day

There he is ladies and gentlemen, my handsome husband known to the world simply as Coach. Here he is with eight 5- and 6-year-olds after their third and final game of soccer against 7-year-olds on a field more than twice the size of what they're used to. Add to that, the goals were bigger, yet the penalty area was tiny. Overall, the games were a bit frustrating to the boys, but they stayed in there after getting over the initial intimidation of the bigger kids and giant fields.

Each of the little kids got a medal and a patch for participation and they were thrilled. The tournament was Nov. 19, but last night as I was tucking Hot Rod in for bed he told me "I can't believe I got a gold medal." He was very proud of it.

Here is the team. Too funny. I love the little guy on the front left. He was SOOOO tired. He is our sole 5-year-old on the team and it is amazing what a difference a year makes at this age. I also love the smiles of all the kids and the kid on the front right looks pained. Little kids are so funny. I love this team, though, even if we have to operate on MST (Mexican Standard Time) for evertying. In case you're not familiar with MST, it is that they show up 15 to 30 minutes past the time you tell them to show up. They're just not in as big of a hurry as us, but we've gotten less anal about it and they're getting a bit better about showing up on time. Not a lot, but a bit. The gringos on the team smile about it most of the time. It is a great cultural exchange for the kids and us, so it is a win-win situation.

During the day, we had lunch at Arby's with some of the players and then we went to Braum's for ice cream for the whole team between games 2 and 3.

The boys had a no soda rule that they were good about following.

We rounded out the day by taking Hot Rod to Cabela's on the way home. So, he got to play there and then he went to stay all night with one of his teammates (the kid sitting next to him in both pictures).

He loved all the hunting and fishing gear and the fish and animals.

My personal favorite below. You can see where he gets his Indian name: Runs From Bear. My kids are such hams. No idea where they get it from.

All in all a good day. Capped with AoD and I seeing the Harry Potter movie.

Add this to the list

I have a list of the things I never thought I'd EVER say and this is a great addition.

Don't lick mommy's furniture.

and another uttered today, too:

Please don't put a sticker on my butt.


I'm so sad

I am actually sitting here with tears in my eyes watching Wife Swap. I'm getting more and more glad that I didn't get picked for the show.

This is awful. They took this very Christian family and swapped them with these atheists. It is awful. I can't imagine a worst place to put me. And, these poor children in this atheist family. The oldest child does EVERYTHING regarding housework. The mom takes the babies to daycare so she can play on the computer all day. She isn't working. She is playing. She won't take the kids outside. It is just jacked up. I feel so badly for these kids.

I am surprised to say that we are not whacky enough to make Wife Swap, I guess. They don't want normal people (ok, as normal as I am ... which isn't very). The nuttier and the farther out there you are, the more likely you'll get picked.

So sad.

That not-so-fresh-feeling

Why did I think being a grown-up would be easy?

I'm 37 now and I'm at that "awkward" age where I have both zits and wrinkles. I have grey hairs that can't come in borderline straight like the rest of my hair. No, oh no. They have to come in curly so they can REALLY stand out. *sigh*

Then, I have a preschooler and two school-aged kids to care for as well as two aging parents who still think I'm the mediator for their issues with one another.

Calgon, take me away!

In the huddle

Crack Daddy is at it again.


I had really hoped that Michael Irvin had cleaned up his act. Apparently not. Maybe it is his friend's stash of goodies, maybe not. Seems like a tired excuse to me. We'll see, I suppose. I loved him on the football field, but was never really a fan of his off-field antics.

Been a big football season for me. My fantasy pairing of Chad Johnson and Carson Palmer has rocked. I wasn't excited about that when the computer drafted for me, but they've been great.

And, LT has been on fire. Army of Dad and I watched him play twice his last season at TCU and he was awesome. Was just amazing to see.

Hot Rod and AoD had a great Sunday spending the afternoon at the local Hooter's watching the Vikes defeat the Browns. What could be better for them? Maybe I shouldn't ask in regards to AoD.

The Seahawks victory was good for me and the Cowboys. Hot Rod calls them the Seagulls and that cracks me up.

The Gators stomped their rivals, the Seminoles and all was good in my home this weekend. The Gators have one of our hometown boys on the team, too, Jarvis Moss. I suppose if the Gators make a regional bowl game, we'll be going. Will be fun. I haven't been to a bowl game.


Cross your fingers


My honey is so on the ball. The Weblog Awards 2005 was taking nominations until Saturday for the best of the best. My sweetie nominated me for the Best of the Top 5001 - 6750 Blogs.

Last year, I finished third in the Weblog 2004 Awards Best of the Top 3,500 to 5,000 Blogs, which was way above my linkage. I get quite a few hits per day, but not as many links os other folks. I have some blogs I visit occasionally who only get about 50 hits per day, but are ranked way above me in the TTLB because they have many links. *shrug*

So, here is a request to send happy thoughts my way that I can make the cut again.

Purring please.

Be vewy vewy quiet

We'we hunting Chwistmas Twees.


Despite the rain coming down steadily on the entire drive, we loaded up the family and my mom and headed to the Ivanhoe Christmas Tree Farm just north of Bonham in Northeast Texas. I used to live and work in Bonham at the now defunct Bonham Daily Favorite and had written about this tree farm when it first was launched back around 1991. We've been to a few different places over the years, but like this one the best. Back in 2001, when we both lost our jobs within 18 hours of one another, we were able to find a 12-foot tree for only $45. It was a Godsend, literally. This year, our 12-foot tree was $96. Ouch, but it looks good with the vaulted ceilings. Little Bit fell asleep on the way to the farm. I stopped and bought ponchos for the boys and umbrellas for us, but as soon as we arrived at the farm. Seriously, as soon as we got out of the car, the rain stopped. It was Divine Intervention.

We woke Stinkerbelle up from a nap and she was cranky.

We had a heckuva time picking a tree. Hot Rod selected one and Pickle picked one. After agonizing over each one for what seemed like an eternity, we picked the one that Pickle had pointed out. This led to Hot Rod running off to pout and cry.

We thought about leaving him, but in the end got him to come back with us.

AoD being manly and cutting down the tree with his injured right wrist.

I stopped and bought the Spongebob ponchos on the way to the tree farm. They were too cute. My little lumberjack. AoD stood the tree back up because Hot Rod was sad because he wanted his picture with the tree.

Look at AoD's pleasant expression, the I-just-finished-crying face on Hot Rod and Pickle's covering of Spongebob's eyes (that was unintentional, but funny). The tractor trailer ride back was much more pleasant aside from my mom refusing AoD's hand to help her up, so she fell. That was bad. But, she was okay.

Finally a smile from the girl. She and Granny had fun when we got back, too.

Then, our tree was bagged and shook. Oh look, a gratuitous cute butt shot.

We got to hang out around the campfire for a marshmallow roast. There were homemade cookies and jams for sale, too.

Another cute kid shot - finally happy. Thank the Lord.

The marshmallow roast was fun. Next year I need to bring graham crackers and chocolate bars.

We had to have seconds, too. Tasted like rice krispie treats a bit.

And, our new van gets the tree loaded up by AoD and some kid who works at the farm. Now, we have our 12-foot tree in the front room. It even has some presents under it, but no lights or decorationes yet. Ok, one ornament on it. My new 2005 penguin ornament. Every year I get a new ornament for the tree. Tree shots will be up soon.

Likeability quiz

I pulled this out of a magazine a few months ago and just ran across it in a pile of papers I was sorting today. It is either from Parenting or Family Circle, but I thought it was funny. I feel like I'm a fairly likeable person, but I wonder after taking this quiz.

Here it is pretty much verbatim. Enjoy!

Here are 15 qualities of a likeable person. Place a check mark next to each statement that describes you. Then tally the checks to find your likeability factor. The good news: you can always improve your score.

*People frequently compliment me on my smile or positive outlook.
*I usually get great service wherever I go.
*My doctor spends more time with me than most other patients.
*My family stays in constant contact with me.
*People readily listen to me and remember what I tell them.
*My love life is fulfilling, and my partner can't wait to see me.
*I get more opportunities at work than most.
*People typically describe me as lucky.
*Others smile when they hear my name.
*People tell their friends about me and "sell me."
*I like most people that I come in contact with.
*I have meaningful relationships as opposed to transactional ones.
*When someone is rude to me, I don't let it spoil my mood.
*I tell the truth, even when it isn't good news.
*When another person spends time with me, she feels good afterward.

Each check mark equals 1 point.
10-15 Congratulations. You have a high likeability factor. You win many of life's popularity contests and bring out the best in others. Keep it up!
6-9 You are positive-minded and bring joy into most people's lives. Focus on bring warmth and enthusiam to your sometimes neglected relationships.
3-5 On a good day, you're happy; but on a bad day, you tend to have a not-so-great attitude. Learn to look at the bright side by counting your blessings. You'll find that you send out friendlier signals.
0-2 You tend to have poor relationships at home and work, and your contenment level is low. But that doesn't mean things can't change. You just have to start consciously working at developing empathy. You'll be surprised at how quickly and kindly people respond.

I think I scored a 13. Yippee. You REALLY do like me or I just have an inflated opinion of myself.


The long and winding road

This was shot today as we left the Christmas tree farm. The leaves in Northeast Texas were gorgeous.

I just thought it was pretty and I've been singing that Beatles song in my head ever since.

My dream man

Finally I had sex dream about someone worthy of sex dreams. This time it wasn't a hobbit or Kelsey Grammar . This time it was Kasey Kahne.

It was a typical fantasy situation, I suppose. In my dream, I was at a car dealer where Kasey was signing autographs on race weekend. I asked for a signature and then asked if I could give him a kiss. *hee hee* Then, it got X-rated from there on out when we went inside the dealership to the GM's office.

What is really amusing is what prompted the dream. AoD and I were able to go out Friday and he generously went with me to run a few errands and one ended up with me buying some Kasey Kahne antenna thingee at Dollar General. I feel very white trash now that I will have a Nascar thing attached to my antenna, but it is Kasey Kahne!!! Back to reality and then to the donut shop. We're going Christmas tree hunting today.

Kasey will be my belated hottie of the week. Sorry ladies. I was taking my kids to Chuck E. Cheese and to the museum Friday and I fell down on the job. No SPF or Hunk this week. I'll make up for it next week.


Happy Thanksgiving!

May we all bury the hatchet. Moonbats and Wingnuts .... Happy Thanksgiving to all.

Things I'm Thankful For

For Thanksgiving, I thought I'd put into words all I'm grateful for this year. Ok, maybe not all, but as much as I can think of off the top of my head while the pumpkin pie is cooking and Picke's comforter is in the laundry.

1. That I have a nice, safe home in which to cook and do laundry.
2. That I have three beautiful, smart, mischievous and loving children.
3. That I have a husband who loves me and puts up with my mood swings.
4. That I haven't been the victim of a natural disaster (or any other kind of disaster).
5. That I live in America where I can bitch about things without fear of retribution for anyone other than judgmental moonbats or over the top wingnuts.
6. That I still have my parents.
7. That I am able to stay home with my children and work from home.
8. That I discovered Firefly and Serenity.
9. Dallas Cowboys every Thanksgiving.
10. For my college education provided by my parents (no student loans to repay, Thank God!)
11. For all of my good friends.
12. For a teacher who cares about my son and has made a difference in his life.
13. That even though my hair is going gray and has lost the luster it had in my youth, that I still have it (I saw a gal at Wal Mart Monday in a bandanna, obviously from chemo hair loss).
14. For my health.
15. Health of my children and family.
16. Tom Hanks
17. Internal combustion engines.
18. Shopping carts
19. Daisies
20. Hot water
21. Victoria's Secret Body By Victora Full Coverage bras
22. Baylor's Lady Bears NCAA basketball national championship
23. NHL, NFL, MLB atheletes and their pregame stretching
24. Digial cameras
25. An ex who pays me child support willingly
26. My washer and dryer
27. That the housekeeper is coming on Friday
28. AOD's hairy chest
29. My panniculectomy
30. Warm baths
31. Sloppy wet kid kisses
32. Waking up to skinny kid legs kicking me in the middle of the night
33. Cell phones, computer and the Internet
34. Karl Urban, Adam Baldwin and other sexy celebrities
35. TBS' A Christmas Story Dec. 24 marathon
36. Penguins
37. Lewis and Clark
38. The way my head fits in the crook of AoD's neck
39. All the blessings that I cant' think of right now!!!
40. My blog!

Say your prayers today and thank God that we live in America!!! God Bless each of you.


I couldn't have said it better

We don't get out the Christmas decorations until Friday after Thanksgiving in the Army of Mom household. My kids are chomping at the bit to put them up. We may have broken out a few Christmas videos and yes I said CHRISTMAS not holiday. Bah, humbug on the holiday folks. I say Happy Hannukah to my brother in law but I refuse to not say Merry Christmas.

LabKat also touched on another of my sore spots - the skipping of Thanksgiving. This is my favorite holiday of the year. It is up there with Christams, Easter and Fourth of July. I love getting together, eating too much and watching the Cowboys. Life couldn't be better. We even have a Thankful Journal that I make everyone who gathers write in. We have to remember what we have to be grateful for this year. We pull the book out for random special occasions, but it always comes out on Thanksgiving. It is a great reminder to ourselves of all of our blessings. I'll write more on Thanksgiving, too.

In the meantime, safe travels and be less stressed and enjoy your family and loved ones. I'm thankful for each of you coming to my little blog.

The good, the bad and the ugly

First off, the good ... I'm terribly sorry people were displaced after the hurricanes. That has to be so challenging to overcome losing your home, probably losing your job and having to start all over again. However, I tend to think three months is a pretty good amount of time to find a job and stop sucking off the government tit completely. Start weaning yourselves, one goverment assistance program at a time. There are so many agencies out there helping these folks, it is just hard for me to believe that those who want to get back on their feet aren't on their way to do so already.

The bad is my hometown's policy on feeding parking meters. I hate this. Now if you have been at the same meter for more than the maximum time - even if the meter has been fed and is current - you will get a ticket. I think this is BS. I understand they there is a BIG shortage of parking at city meters downtown and parking lots charge you an arm and a leg, but that is crap. If someone is keping the meter fed and paying the meter, then that spot should be his or hers until they no longer feed it and move the car. This is crap. I can see my mom having to get up at the library every two hours to move her car. Never mind that she had a stroke a few months ago and is slow to get around and gets weak easily, need to make sure that she doeesn't take that valuable spot on the curb from someone else who didn't get there early enough to get the spot.

The ugly is the group of Fort Worth residents who raised a stink about having to follow the rules regarding putting your trash out in a certain fashion and not leaving shit out there for days on end. Ok, I know, I'm an oxymoron regarding Fort Worth. I hate the parking meter rule, but like the trash one. Thing is, I think the trash and recycling thing is pretty easy to follow. Put your trash in bags in the container. Easy enough. Don't leave the container out for two days. Again, come on people, how hard is that? WBAP did a story on the "trash classes" people can take to get out of their $311 tickets for non-compliance. These trashy ass folks were still bitching. Hello? I cannot begin to tell you the number of times I have seen dogs eating trash that has been ripped up from people not following the rules. It isn't that hard.

*taking a deep breath and putting my soap box away*

Now, I'm off to enjoy a day with my son and my mom. Just a mom and me kind of day for Hot Rod. Stinkerbelle had her special day. Pickle will get one soon.


Thanksgiving feast

I get to attend two today. I really wish I could clone myself. Pickle's starts at 11:30 and Hot Rod's starts at noon. Last year, their classrooms were across the hall from each other. This year, no such luck. So, me and Stinkerbelle will be going to one for 30 minutes and to the other for about the same length. Hopefuly, all will work out okay.

And, I know you'll be shocked, but I'll take pictures. :)

Princess Stinkerbelle

I'm way behind on posting. My apologies.

On Nov. 16, I took Stinkerbelle and my mom to see the Disney Princesses on Ice. It was a late start, so she was pretty tuckered out, but she had a ball. She was more interested in Mickey and Minnie than she was the princesses, but she hasn't seen some of these movies either. There were girls in princess costumes as far as the eye could see. I had to snap a shot of the girls in the row ahead of us.

My little gal went in a pretty pink sweatsuit, so she'd be warm. She was so excited and had such a great time.

another happy face

and, here is Mickey and Minnie.

We tried to get her picture taken with Cinderella at the photo set up, but the line was so long, we settled on a shot with one of the princesses at the souvenir booth. This was at the intermission.

and, this was after the show. I love that silly hat.

Disney on Ice is one of those pleasures I have to indulge in for the children. Even if we're dirt poor, I'll save up to taken them. We have been lucky to get discount tickets every time we've gone and never paid more than $15 a ticket and gotten good seats. *knock on wood*

On the subject of tribbles

See, this is what happens when I let my mind wander instead of working.

I mentioned tribbles and my laundry and started a search for tribbles. I found a tribble quiz and just like If you give a mouse a cookie, I had to take the quiz. I scored a 5. I'm not much on old Star Trek trivia. Average score is a 5.58, so just a bit below average.

Random things

Lots of stuff I've wanted to blog about, but no time. I miss reading all the blogs, too.


1. Picking up Stinkerbelle from preschool Monday afternoon. Another mom and a grandma were picking up Stinkerbelle's classmate, Jack.
Jack's Mom: Jack, did you introduce your friend Stinkerbelle to your Mimi?
Jack: *looking at mom blankly*
MiMi and Mom: *smiling at children*
Stinkerbelle: He's not my friend!!!!
AoM: *smiling sheepishly and rushing children off quickly*

Oh, I could have died. Jack didn't act like she was his friend either, but still. I was mortified.

2. I want to attend a Cowboys Thanksgiving game before I die. I forgot that on my list of the five things I want to do before I croak.

3. Laundry reproduces in my house faster than tribbles (which are born pregnant, Dr. McCoy discovered.)

Happiness in my household

Yes indeedy. Two of the five of us rejoiced this morning to awaken and find the Vikes beat down the Packers 20-17 last night. None of us had the energy to stay up and watch it all.

And there was great rejoicing.


Kicks, punches, strikes and blocks

The four parts of American Karate that my children study ... thankfully there is no rochambeauing.

Damn, my kids are cute.

Getting in the mood to kick some ass.

Thanks to Uzz for the pics.

Our small contribution to the cause

We didn't buy all the ammo that Army of Dad was hoping to get for National Ammo Day, but we did our part.

We bought 200 rounds of .22, 250 rounds of .40 and 150 rounds of .38. We probably would have gotten more, but I got some new sneakers and Army of Dad got a new bicycle.

Brunch with Bloggers

El Capitan set it up and today we had our Brunch with Bloggers at Cafe Brazil in Richardson. It was nice to go and meet people and visit and have breakfast sans children!!!

From left to right (althought honestly those of us are on the left here are the ones who lean most to the right, ironically enough! But, I digress.) is El Capitan from Baboon Pirates, me and Army of Dad, Zippo from Zippo the Pirate and Jenni from A Day in the Life.

I had not been to the other blogs prior to just skimming them over before going to the brunch. Thankfully, I had not read the tripe, er blog, done by Andy at The Kilted Liberal or I might not have been as pleasant. I mean, I do tolerate LabKat, but we have history and all for me to get around some of her demented leanings (no offense intended Precious.) Andy and the Missus brought their baby and were very pleasant. I bounced the baby and whispered Catholic and Republican things in her ear (just kidding) before pronouncing the child to be tired and handing her back to her kilted dad. Swear to God. The dude had on a kilt. Not Scottish that he knows of, just digs kilts. I saved my one and only kilt story because it was a wee bit inappropriate for the occasion. Wanna hear it? Ok, here it goes. In a liquor store in Fort Worth on New Year's Eve a few years ago, I saw a guy with a kilt on. I asked him what they wear under the kilt and after some joking and crude remarks, he asked me if I really wanted to know. Yes, I said. Lipstick, he replied with a wink. Took me a moment to get it, but it was funny when I did.

Again, I digress.

We had a nice time just visiting and I hope to keep meeting bloggers. It is a nice way to see the world. So far, I've met the Gun Guy from the National of Riflemen and North Dallas Thirty and the above bloggers ... who's next?

You like me!

You really like me!

Or maybe you're just stumbling upon my site, cussing me out and leaving this gorrammed blog never to return without sending in the trolls.

Looks like I should hit a quarter million hits before Christmas. Not too shabby for a foul-mouthed soccer mom in the heart of Texas.

Any requests for blog topics? Questions you have for me? Pictures you'd like to see? Hmm. Maybe I should strike that last one. No promises on any of these, although I haven't done a good furries or furries and hobbits post in a while. My Pippin sex entry probably gets some weird hits from LOTR pervs.

Welcome to the furries and hobbit lovers. And, please don't run away all you normal people. By the way, what are you doing here?


Unfortunate reminder

Sometimes life sends us sad reminders and the death of Dallas Police Officer Brian Jackson a little less than a week ago was one of those wake-up calls for me. Jackson was shot while chasing after a illegal immigrant who threatened his ex-girlfriend.

Army of Dad was a cop for about a year and I was a nervous wreck most of that time. The phone ringing at 2 a.m. sent shivers down my spine as I looked at it and reached for it never knowing if it was AoD calling to tell me he was working late or if it was someone else calling to tell me something had happened.

Just a week ago, AoD and I had a big argument. A really big argument and the virtual daggers were flying. I seldom seriously wish ill on someone, but the little devil on my shoulder was suggesting all sorts of unkind outcomes for him. Then, I heard the news Monday morning about Officer Jackson. It softened my heart. Driving down the road and listening to talk radio discussing the incident and I just sobbed while I drove. I felt so bad for his widow of only a few months. I just kept thinking about those newlyweds and envisioning what it must have been like - putting off having kids for a few years so they could enjoy their time together and get ready for a baby and now she will never have a part of him with her and I know the regret must be enormous. After 9/11, I knew life was too short and is such a gift, I wanted another piece of AoD to have with me in case anything ever happened to him. I look at my children and see him in their faces, their mannerisms and their love. I feel so much pity for this woman who is a widow too soon. She buried her husband Friday.

Hail Mary, full of grace
Our Lord is with thee.
Blessed art thou among women,
and blessed is the fruit of thy womb,
Holy Mary, Mother of God,
pray for us sinners,
now and at the hour of our death.

Moms Gone Wild

Nothing like a little soccer momminess to cut short my Moms Gone Wild evening out with the gals tonight. Yes, blog readers, it is indeed 1:51 in the morning. I'm never up at this time, but I just got in from my slumber party cut short. My friend's car is parked out in front of my house because she and another friend found another ride home so she could stay all night. Alas, I have to be up in about four hours, so I came home.


But, on the bright side, I did get to eat a cupcake in which someone inscribed in icing the fabulous philosophical statement: Eat Me. Another friend took a picture of me eating it and then we got one *faint hearted, look away now* of another friend of mine pretending to eat another Eat Me cupcake from my cleavage. The coup de gras of our night of debauchery was when I won a Girls Gone Wild video. *rolling my eyes* I'm sure Army of Dad will want to watch that tonight after Harry Potter. I made the crowd roar with laughter when I flashed them as I went to receive my major award. Come of think of it, there may have been a camera flash at that time, too. Yikes, my boobs may be on the Internet tomorrow. Yikes.

It was fun, though. Some girls were taking glamour shots, others were smoking outside in the cold and *shh, don't tell* but the hostess had four slot machines in her game room and we played slots, too. We also did those things like talk about alarm clocks and getting kids up in the mornings to head lice, acne and everything else.

I hope this was coherent. I'm cold and tired. I didn't even drink tonight because I had to drive an hour to get home. Me and the Dr Pepper survived a drive home listening to Firefly on my DVD player in the van. IT certainly made the drive home bearable. Ruddin soccer tournament. Nah, I think it will be shiny, just going to be one tired momma.


Addendum: I almost forgot the traffic jam on the way to the party, which was in BFE. Dufus Bubba was driving down the highway hauling haybales when he tossed a cigarette out the window and set his hay on fire. So, me and the girls in my van sat on the BFE Highway waiting for the fire department to put it out. As Bill Engvall would say, here's your sign!


Difficult Times Lie Ahead Harry

Finally, today, Goblet of Fire is coming out. We can't go today, but will be there tomorrow.

Stuff Portrait Friday - My past, present and future

Stuff Portrait Friday's assignment was something from my past, my present and my future with the caveat that we can't use our kids in any of the shots.

Random and Odd has some good ones in the comments today. Here is my best effort completely concocted while hanging out at my house working and doing laundry.

My Past

The towel was a high school graduation gift that my kids use now. The denim overalls are one of those outfits that all three kids have worn, as is evidenced by the knee-stains. I had to have those when Pickle was 2. I loved it and so have all three kids.

My Present

Laundry to put away. That is a constant daily chore with three active kids.

My Future

This one is probably self-evident, but I hope and pray that I'll be fotunate enough to get into Heaven when I die.

Ring of Fire

The voice just doesn't look like it should come out of Joaquin Phoenix, but it is his I've been told. Walk the Line is a movie I'll see eventually. I've always liked Johnny Cash. Loved his Nine Inch Nails cover.

Anyway. I love Joaquin. I have since Gladiator. He is a good bad guy, a good good guy ... ok, he just looks good.

Hello, I'm Johnny Cash.

As the evil dude from Gladiator...

I love that sneer. He could get as mad at me as he wanted as long as he looked like that.
Upclose and looking good.

And his "just got laid" hair.

I have something on fire, not sure it is a ring though. Enjoy ladies.